Page 6 of Lessons in Love at the Cornish Country Hospital

‘Okay.’ Wendy nodded, suddenly feeling like she wanted to grab hold of Chloe and not let go until she’d promised Wendy there was a way of making everything okay for Zara. ‘What can we do?’

‘I think we need to talk to her, gently and calmly, and most of all be ready to listen. It’s not an easy process, and if I’m honest I still feel the urge to slip back into old ways, and I still go toa support group sometimes too. It helped me understand what my triggers are, and, for me, it was always worse when I needed some control in my life. Food was something I could do that with, even when I had no control over anything else. It could be very different for Zara, so we have to be ready to hear what she has to say, rather than telling her what we think.’

‘You should be the one who talks to her.’ As unbearable as Wendy found it that Chloe might be better placed to help Zara than she was, she knew it was true. How she felt about it, and the jealousy that had snaked its way around her heart every time she saw how close her daughters were becoming to Mike’s partner, didn’t matter. Nothing mattered anymore, except that Zara was okay.

‘Are you sure? I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes.’

‘I’m sure.’ Wendy let go of a long breath, closing her eyes so she didn’t have to look at Chloe when she said what she had to say next. ‘I know it must have been hard to tell me and that I haven’t made it easy for you to talk to me about the girls.’

‘I know how much you love them, but I do too.’ Chloe was looking at her when Wendy opened her eyes again and she managed a nod.

‘You’ll keep me in the loop when you talk to her, won’t you?’

‘Of course.’ Chloe nodded too. ‘We’re a team now.’

‘Uh-huh.’ Wendy hated how much she wished that wasn’t true, but she managed a weak smile that didn’t hurt her face quite as much as the first one had. ‘Thank you.’ They were just two words that Wendy said over her shoulder, as she headed off down the corridor, but it was probably the most sincere thing she’d ever said to her ex-husband’s girlfriend. She just hoped with all her heart that Chloe would know how to help Zara, because she couldn’t bear the thought of anything really bad happening to one of her children. And she wasn’t sure it was something she could survive.

4

Wendy was trying not to watch every mouthful of food that Zara ate, but it had been hard to relax around her youngest daughter ever since Chloe had forced her to face the possibility of Zara having an eating disorder. She spent far more time in her room than Wendy would have liked, whenever she was at home, but she knew from Alice’s teenage years that it was normal behaviour for girls of that age, and it didn’t mean she was harbouring some deep, dark secret. But as much as she was desperate to hold on to the hope that Chloe might be wrong, there was no denying that Zara had lost weight. The jeans she’d insisted she’d just had to have, which had cost more than Wendy had ever spent on an item of clothing – including her wedding dress – were hanging off her.

‘Why do you keep staring at me?’ Zara shot Wendy a look when she caught her mother watching her eating scrambled eggs at a pace a sloth would have found frustratingly slow. The eggs must have been stone cold by now, and both Wendy and Gary had polished off a full English breakfast in the time Zara had been picking at her food.

‘It’s just nice to have you here for a full day and not have to worry about you rushing off for college, or me heading to work.’ Wendy reached forward and brushed a strand of hair away from her daughter’s face. ‘What do you fancy doing today?’

‘Actually I’m going out.’ Zara had the good grace to look sheepish. ‘I’m sorry Mum, I didn’t realise you’d want to do anything. You should have said.’

‘I didn’t think I had to, seeing as it’s my weekend with you.’

‘I live here. Dad and Clo are the ones I have weekends with; you get me all the time.’ Zara pulled a face and stood up, as if she was already preparing to leave. ‘So I didn’t think you’d mind, because we can do stuff anytime, and this is a one-off.’

‘What’s a one-off?’ Wendy raised her eyebrows; her daughter was probably about to claim a trip to the shops with her mates was some kind of rare event, but they both knew otherwise.

‘Chloe is going to pick some things out for the baby’s nursery, and she wants me to go with her.’ To Zara’s credit, she hadn’t lied, but Wendy almost wished she had. At least then it wouldn’t have hurt so much.

‘Why couldn’t she have done it on a weekend you’re at your dad’s? I can’t think why on earth you want to go and look at furniture for a baby’s room, anyway. When I tried to get you to come and look at some wardrobes for your own bedroom, you acted like I was violating your human rights.’ Wendy wanted to laugh and cry at the same time, at the absurdity of it all.

‘It’s not just a baby’s room, it’s my little brother’s room. And going shopping with Clo is different.’ Zara sighed, and Wendy tried not to resent the way her daughter shortened Chloe’s name. It sounded so familiar and affectionate, which was exactly what it was. ‘She knows how to make it fun.’

‘I see.’ Wendy stood up and took her plate to the sink, so her daughter wouldn’t see how upset she was. It was all she could do not to snap back that she was sorry she didn’t makeprofessional-looking videos of every shopping trip they had, or that she was apparently not fun. She was frightened she’d burst into tears if she said anything much at all. But then Zara wrapped her arms around her mother’s waist from behind.

‘I’m sorry Mum, I really didn’t think you’d mind, and Chloe’s only doing it this weekend because there’s a sale on at one of the places we’re going to. Dad’s playing golf or something, and Clo said we could go out for lunch afterwards, and we didn’t have any plans, did we?’

‘No, we didn’t.’ Wendy turned around and pulled her daughter towards her. She needed to be more grateful for moments like these. Not every seventeen-year-old would cuddle their mother the way Zara still did, and Chloe had promised to talk to her about her eating. She might have decided that this time alone together would give them the perfect opportunity. Either way, Wendy wasn’t going to stand in the way of them spending time together, even if it stung that her daughter clearly preferred spending time with Chloe. This wasn’t about Wendy, it was about Zara, and having a good relationship with her father’s girlfriend was a huge positive, logically she knew that. Wendy just wished she felt as happy about it as she should.

‘You’re eating more blackberries than you’re picking.’ Wendy couldn’t help laughing as she looked at Gary, whose purple lips gave him away, before he shrugged and grinned in admission.

‘Two for me, one for the pot. That’s fair, surely?’

‘Just remember that when there’s not enough fruit for me to make a crumble.’ Wendy shook her head, but she was still smiling. Stealing the fruit was the worst deception she had toworry about with Gary, which was something it was very easy to forgive.

‘There must be enough here for a crumble, especially if we’re having apple with it.’

‘Maybe, but the priority is to have enough fruit for my blackberry jam. I want it to be ready for Christmas. We always have croissants and homemade jam first thing, it’s one of our traditions, and I want everything to be perfect this year. It might be the last Christmas Day we get with the girls.’ Wendy focused on reaching up for a berry, so she wouldn’t have to look at him.

‘Why would you think that? Last year was the best Christmas I can remember in a long time. Having all four of our kids together, and seeing how well they get on, especially how good Zara and Alice are with Albert, treating him like he really is their nephew.’ Gary turned Wendy to face him. ‘All of that could have been so much harder than it has been.’

‘The girls adore Albert, and he is their nephew as far as they’re concerned. I know they love spending time with Drew, Beth and Tom too. But when their little brother arrives, the draw of being with him at Christmas is going to be even stronger, especially when Beth and Tom take Albert to spend Christmas with his family, or with Rachel.’

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