Page 36 of Happily Never After

Luke put a hand over his eyes. His shoulders slumped. “You know the FBI has code breakers, right?”

“Yes, and they’re doing a shitty job.” She thrust one hand into the air.

His hand wrapped around her thigh. “Hey. It’s going to be okay.”

“I’m sorry, wasn’t your pool quite literally just full of blood?”

“It was food dye.”

“Right. That makes it way less scary that people stormed onto your land and tampered with your property.”

He stood up and headed down the hallway.

“Where are you going? You barely touched your dinner. I can’t be held accountable for what happens to it if you leave.” She craned her neck, but he had disappeared. With any luck, he was setting up a sexy surprise as a distraction.

Rosie followed him back and sat outside her office. She sniffed the door and whined. What was he doing in there?

The door swung open, and he stepped out. “Come on.”

“What?” Claire said, mouth full of shrimp.

Luke swore under his breath and came back to the kitchen, then picked her up like she was a rag doll. He deposited her in her office chair and wheeled her down the hallway to her desk. Her webcam was on, and someone was onscreen.

“Hello, Claire.” Dr. Goulding’s voice came through the speakers.

Claire jumped. This was not the sexy surprise she had hoped for. “What is this, a therapy ambush?”

The doctor leaned forward and pressed the tips of her fingers together. She was wearing the gold earrings Claire and Mindy had helped Sawyer pick out for Christmas.

“Luke told me he thinks you’re having trouble processing what happened at the trial. He thought you could use a chat.”

Luke ushered Rosie out and shut the door behind them. Traitor. Some work and a glass of wine were all the therapy she needed.

Claire frowned. “I’m not having trouble processing. We won. He’s in prison. The end.”

“Luke also told me about what happened after the trial. With the pool.”

She crossed her arms over her chest. Why couldn’t anyone just let her be? She didn’t want to feel all her feelings all the time.It was exhausting. She just wanted to tamp them down into a nice little box and focus on something else.

“What do you want to hear? That I don’t feel safe, even with him in prison?”

Dr. Goulding leaned back and hooked an arm over the back of her chair. “Don’t you?”

“OfcourseI don’t feel safe. Am I relieved he’s behind bars and not walking the streets looking for more victims? Yes. But one good thing happened and immediately I faced retaliation from his idiot friends. There’s no end to this, Dr. Goulding. I’m going to be looking over my shoulder for the rest of my life. One man in prison means nothing. There are probably a hundred more killers to take his place.”

Dr. Goulding was quiet.

Claire drew her legs up in front of her and clutched them. “I just want to plan proposals, you know? Happily ever afters. I don’t want to bring down serial killer rings and solve riddles and confront murderers in prison. I just want to do my job and live my life without being afraid.”

“Everything you’re feeling is valid. You did an incredibly brave and difficult thing,” Dr. Goulding observed. “A killer met justice because of you. Why do you think you feel a responsibility to bring down the rest of them?”

“Am I supposed to just shut my eyes and pretend like innocent women everywhere aren’t being ritualistically abducted and murdered? Just because they have the audacity to be successful?” Her arms swept out to her sides.

“It’s not your responsibility, Claire. I know it feels like it is, but it’s not.”

Claire leaned back in her chair and heaved a sigh. Dr. Goulding was right about a lot of things, but this wasn’t one of them. ESA was not going to go away. Her life would never benormal again until they were brought down. She couldn’t stand by and do nothing.

She wouldn’t.

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