Page 17 of Happily Never After

Dr. Goulding shook her head. “I’m not a business consultant, but you’ve built a strong company. You are organized, disciplined, and diligent. Sometimes you have to take a risk in order to grow. Risks are scary, but they can lead to amazing things. I have faith in you.”

“Thank you.” Claire leaned back. As much as she hated to admit it, the crushing weight that had rested on her shoulders when she came in might have lightened by a couple of ounces. Maybe there was something to therapy after all.

“So. Thursday,” Dr. Goulding prompted.

Damn it. She had almost forgotten. Claire frowned.

“Sawyer mentioned that Barney will be accepting a plea deal,” the doctor continued.

Claire crossed her arms. “Isn’t it unethical to discuss clients with your children?”

The doctor set her teacup down on the coffee table with a rattle. “He told me because he suspected you wouldn’t. How do you feel about the plea deal?”

Claire inhaled deeply and made eye contact with the ceiling. She gripped an accent pillow with a pug on it and held it to her chest.

“To be honest, I feel betrayed. I’ve been trying not to think about it because the best-case scenario is Barney gets ten years in prison. Worst-case scenario is maybe five. And that doesn’t take into account a year of time served. He took so much from me, and it feels like the justice system is failing.”

Dr. Goulding nodded. “Ten years is not a lot of time.”

“It isn’t. In ten years, I hope to be married, maybe have a mini-Claire or two. How can I bring a child into this world knowing that that monster is still out there?” She gestured at the window, where a beady-eyed pigeon bobbed his head. “Not to mention that when I get married—if I get married—I’ll officially fit the West Haven Widowmaker’s criteria. What’s to stop him from trying to kill me again? From hurting my husband or my children? And then the fact that he’s not working alone?—”

Wait. ESA was strictly need-to-know information. Her father would blow a gasket if she talked about ESA in a room that hadn’t even been swept for bugs.

“There’s a lot to be worried about,” the doctor said. Her voice was like aloe vera. “How do you feel about facing him in court? Have you started working on your statement?”

Claire shrugged. “Facing him doesn’t scare me as much anymore after my visit to him in prison.” The FBI had pressured her into visiting Barney. As uncomfortable as it was, it had led to the recovery of Kayley Herrold’s body.

“It makes me physically ill to look at him, to see the evil in his eyes and remember that night, but it’s not as scary as it used to be,” she added.

Dr. Goulding nodded and was silent.

Claire gripped the pillow harder. “As for the impact statement, I have sat down at my laptop half a dozen times the last couple days, looking for the words. How do you even begin to explain the ‘impact’ he’s had on my life? And he’ll be therewhen I read it. He loves rehashing his crimes. I don’t want him to get some sort of sick pleasure from it.”

The doctor’s eyebrows knit together. “A victim impact statement is meant to be a way for you to show how the crime and the perpetrator have affected your life. He’ll be there to hear it, yes, but he’s not your audience. You’re telling the judge how this has changed your life. Usually victims talk about how they have changed emotionally, financially. What did his actions cost you?”

Claire bit her lip and set her gaze on the window. The pigeon stared inquisitively back at her. In truth, Barney had nearly cost her everything. At the most superficial level, he had taken her one-of-a-kind wedding dress and her business reputation. Panties from her hamper. Her sense of security, faith in the basic good of humankind, her belief in herself. He had almost taken her life. He took what he wanted with no mercy or remorse. But he wasn’t going to get away with it. She would write the damn thing, and she would land him in prison for as long as possible. And he would be there to see it.

Dr. Goulding glanced at the clock on the wall. “I’m afraid our time’s up for the day. I’m more than happy to schedule another session before the hearing if you think it’ll be useful.”

Claire shook her head and jumped up. “I’ll be fine. Thanks, Doctor.”

When the door snapped shut behind her, Claire leaned against it and took a deep breath. All she had to do was take out a massive business loan, pull off the biggest proposal of her career, take down a ring of serial killers, and stare into the eyes of the man who tried to murder her. Easy peasy.

CHAPTER SIX

To Do:

- Pick up donuts for bank meeting

- Remember to breathe

Claire exitedthe doors of First Financial Bank on Tuesday afternoon and ripped her blazer off. Adrenaline still sizzled through her.

Mindy collapsed onto the concrete stairs.

“I can’t believe we did it.” Claire sat down heavily beside her.

“One hundred thousand dollars.” Mindy’s skin was paler than usual. She clutched her stomach. “What the hell were we thinking?”

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