Page 180 of A Soul to Steal

For so long, he’d been trying to push those thoughts from his conscience. He’d ignored them, shaking his head when they tried to emerge, but being here, in this place, it was hard to keep them at bay any longer.

Inaudible rambling fell on his unlistening ears.

Aleron was too busy being overwhelmed by the memory of dozens of feet chasing him. The yelps and cries that filled the air, unsure if they were his own or Ingram’s. The scent of Demonblood and Mavka blood blending together into a disgusting coppery mixture.

The utter darkness that shadowed Aleron on a night he could see clearly in, blocking him out from the world as he was overrun by writhing bodies.

We were so close.

He didn’t know if it was the present or the past where his chest rattled with agony until soft, warm fingers slipped against the inside of his own. Shocked by it, he darted his hand away. The foreign touch didn’t belong in his memories of sharp fangs and claws.

He looked down to his side as the little human frowned up at him. “Aleron?”

He realised then that the rattling in his chest was due to him whimpering. He’d also ruined the chance for his bride to hold his hand, like he often longed for, by recoiling away.

“I’m sorry they’re not here.” His apology bothered Aleron, simply because he didn’t wish for his human to do this.

He didn’t want Gideon to apologise anymore. It only made the male recede into himself whenever he did.

This is why I did not want to come here.Aleron knew he’d be unsettled in this place. Merikh’s ward had once been a beacon of safety, and now it felt like a dark spot within his subconscious.

I should have known Ingram would not bring his bride so close to where we were separated.But he was... desperate.

Aleron didn’t know where else to go, where else Ingram could be.

A sigh parted his fangs, as a heavy weight seemed to lie over his very essence. It was cold as it wrapped around him like a wet cloth of clinging sadness and pain.

“I am upset that they are not here,” he admitted, unfurling his fist before looking back into the Veil. Part of him wanted to go towhere it all happened to see if he could find pieces of his broken skull fragments. “But that is not why I am unsettled.”

“Do you want to talk to me about it?” Gideon offered, his bowed eyes filled with concern. “I’d be happy to listen.”

Another whimper fell from him.I want to.More than anything, he wanted his bride to comfort him. Aleron desired to lean on him, as he would have his kindred.

“It is because I died not far from here. Ingram and I... We were trying to make our way here, knowing we would be safe once we were inside this ward. It is just beyond the trees, a short distance in. A few minutes. If we had made it...”

Before he could continue, soft fingers tickled the inside of his once more. The solace of them as they tentatively slipped over his roughness warmed him. Aleron didn’t shy away from the contact this time, and Gideon attempted to poke his fingertips through the large gaps.

The gesture meant much and quelled the worst of his sorrow. He was thankful the little human braved trying again, despite how Aleron responded the first time.

It was also a reminder.

If we had made it... he would not be here with me.Aleron tilted his sight down to Gideon. His handsome face, filled with so much worry forhissake that it was all crinkled and screwed up, gazed up at him almost expectantly.I would not have him, and Ingram would not have found Emerie.

They would have continued playing in the world, none the wiser that they would shortly find brides of their own should they painfully part ways.

For a moment, he’d regretted his death. In doing so, he hurt his own consciousness and immediately felt guilt.

Because... if he chose to regret it, it would mean that Gideon was never meant to be his bride, and he’d chosen wrong. Their chances of meeting would have been impossible. WithoutEmerie to guide them, without Aleron dying, he never would have met this human who had already left this world.

He didn’t wish to think this way.

“I am sorry,” Aleron said, turning to him. “This is not a pleasant conversation.”

Gideon rolled his eyes with a scoff. “I don’t care if it’s pleasant or the most depressing thing I’ve ever heard.” He lifted Aleron’s hand and pressed his free palm on top of it. “This is the second time you have really spoken to me about how you feel about when you died. I want to be here for you through it.”

Tenderness swelled in Aleron’s chest, even as he shook his head. “I am burdened by this, yes, but I do not want to think on it. It is in the past.”

A small gust filled with leaf litter wrapped around their shared silence as they gazed upon each other. Despite the chill, all Aleron could feel was the warmth of their hands touching. Then, understanding that Aleron truly wished to leave it be, Gideon sighed. Gideon released him and stepped back while rubbing the side of his neck.