Samuel slept soundly beside me. He’d had only one glass of wine during dinner, but I was sure he’d had more drinks afterward while in his office. I had already been asleep when he joined me. A nightmare had woken me, and a message popping up on his phone that illuminated the room had stopped me from falling back asleep right away. The room lit up with another message. It was past midnight. I carefully sat up, worried about wakingSamuel. His two phones both sat on the nightstand, but it was his second phone, the one with F., that kept lighting up.
I couldn’t make out who sent the messages. I craned my neck as another message popped up, this time with a photo that didn’t show on the screen. My curiosity and suspicion were almost unbearable. I should trust Samuel, but our world rarely rewarded trust. I bit my lip. If I used my wheelchair to get to Samuel’s side, he would definitely hear it, even if he was slightly drunk. I scooted a bit closer to him. Maybe I could reach over him? But if he caught me, he’d be furious.
I lay back down and tried to fall back asleep, but two more messages lit up the room. I sat back up and tried to lean over Samuel to reach his phone. If I could touch the screen, I’d see if the messages were from F. again. Another message illuminated the room.
Samuel stirred, his brows snatching together, face twisting with pain. “No.”
He shook his head, his body twisted. He was having a nightmare. My gaze drifted between the phone and Samuel, and I touched his shoulder gently. He didn’t react until I shook him harder, then his eyes flew open a moment before his phone turned dark again and blackened my vision.
Of course, another message lit up our room shortly after, so Samuel’s disorientated expression came into view. He sat up, so I had to lean back. He reached for his phone and turned it over.
I swallowed. “You had a nightmare.”
“I have many nightmares,” Samuel murmured. He turned on the light, causing me to squeeze my eyes shut. He perched on the edge of the bed, his back to me. Scars covered his skin. I too had a few of them, but not as many as Samuel, and I couldn’t remember the incident that caused them, so my nightmares always revolved around the moment I woke up in the hospital, unable to speak.
“Do you want to talk about them?”
“No,” he clipped. He touched a scar on his side.
Hurt, I leaned back against the headboard. His gaze darted to the phone he’d turned over so I couldn’t see the incoming messages anymore.
“Go on, read your messages from F. I’m sure she has something important to share.”
Samuel slanted a cautious look over his shoulder. “Did you read them?”
So it really was a she. I was angry with myself for thinking that our promising sex life meant Samuel wouldn’t also seek out other women. Why did I believe his talk about fidelity?
“I did not,” I pressed out, close to tears.
Samuel regarded me closely, then shook his head. “I told you I’m faithful, Emma. This isn’t what you think it is.”
I raised my eyebrows. “It’s not? You’re chatting with a woman, and you keep it a secret from me. She’s even sending you photos, and I’m pretty sure they aren’t G-rated.”
Samuel reached for his phone and stared down at it. His body was shielding the screen from my view. “Here,” Samuel murmured and handed me the phone. I took it with shaking fingers, and with a feeling of trepidation, I looked down at the screen and the string of photos. I frowned, not understanding what I saw. It showed two dark-haired children in front of a huge birthday cake. I could only see their backs. The girl wore a tutu, and the boy what looked like boxing shorts. And suddenly, it clicked. I looked up at my husband.
Samuel’s shoulders sagged, and he shook his head with a look of resignation. “What I tell you now is betrayal. Not of you, but the Outfit. If word gets out, I’d be punished harshly.”
My eyes grew wide. “My loyalty lies with you, not the Outfit.”
Samuel twisted his head toward me and smiled bitterly. Then he sighed and nodded. “F is short for Fina. Serafina, my twin.”
“Oh,” I breathed, my suspicions being confirmed. The children in the photo must be the twins. Remo Falcone’s twins. Now I knew why he thought it was betrayal. Why had I never thought about F being his sister? I hadn’t known he called her Fina, but I could have made the connection if not for being so insecure because of gossip. It had seemed more logical for him to betray me than the Outfit. I was relieved but, at the same time, worried for him. Our Capo Dante was his uncle, but betrayal was difficult to tolerate.
“I thought you ended all contact when she went back to Remo Falcone.” I glanced at another photo showing Fina’s smiling face as she hugged the girl in the tutu.
“I should have,” he murmured, pain and regret in his voice. “But she’s my twin.”
I couldn’t even begin to understand what it meant to be connected to someone from the womb, so I didn’t judge him.
“The twins had their sixth birthday a couple of weeks ago. Then there was our wedding. My sister tried to establish closer contact again, probably feeling nostalgic.”
“You miss her,” I said softly, touching his back.
“I miss the sister I had before Remo twisted her into someone else. She isn’t that person anymore, and I’m not the same person I was before she was kidnapped.”
Again he touched the scar on his side.
“Does it hurt?”