I wanted him to be there to cheer for me, to hug me, to congratulate me. Tonight was supposed to be this big success and he was supposed to be a part of it, you know? That’s all a partner wants, really.
So ... that’s why I went to be alone. I miss him and my heart was breaking but I didn’t want to ruin the night for anyone. I know you probably don’t want to hear all that but I guess what I’m trying to say is thank you for coming to find me. Thank you for understanding and caring when you didn’t have to, Deke.
I read over my email three times, chewing on my acrylic nail. It was too much information. Too personal. I wanted to delete it—say forget it and force myself to sleep ... but something in the back of my mind told me Dekeneededto hear this.
Perhaps if I opened up to him a bit, he’d open up to me too. I wouldn’t push it, though. He hadn’t pushed me about it when we were by the fountain, and I appreciated that more than he knew.
With a shaky breath, I sent the email, then lay on my back and stared up at the ceiling fan. The blades whirled, and my heartbeat slowed to a steady pace, pulsing in my ears.
I closed my eyes, and just when I felt the regret sneaking its way in, my phone chimed.
From: Deke Bishop
To: Davina Klein-Roberts
Wow. That hit me deep. Sorry you’re hurting so much inside right now, D. I get it though. Wanting to put on that brave face even though you’re unraveling from every seam. Thank you for being honest with me. Told you you’re real.
And I’ll always care, Davina. I’m not just saying that. Don’t know what it is about you but something keeps nagging me to hit you up and make sure you’re good. If it’s alright with you I’d like to check in every once in a while to make sure of it. That cool?
I smiled, and this time I didn’t hide it or fight it.
That’s cool,I replied.
TWENTY-TWO
DEKE
Though I loved the designer clothes, the shoes, and my Ferrari parked in the private garage connected to my condo, when it came to seeing family, I liked to keep it low key.
So what did I do? Rented a Mazda from one of the airport’s rental car services so I could pick my nephew up from camp without making a scene.
Camille had called as soon as I touched down in Florida. She was stressing about being late to pick up Eli and how her fiancé would be running late too.
“Sis, I got you,” I said, marching through one of the terminals. I noticed a man looking at me as if he was familiar with me, but I pulled my eyes away and kept walking. I was glad I wore a hat. “I’ll pick Eli up. Just send me the address for his camp.”
“Deke, thank you,” she said with so much relief she may as well have melted. “I’ll call the camp and let them know you’ll be picking him up.”
Before I knew it, I was driving with my seven-year-old nephew in the passenger seat, with J. Cole rapping and both of us bobbing our heads to the beat of the songs.
“Uncle Deke! Watch this!” Eli started doing some crazy dance little kids do, shaking his arms and kicking his legs as he rocked to the beat. I snorted a laugh as I pressed a hand to his chest.
“All right, all right, big dog. Slow down. I see you.”
Eli grinned from ear to ear as he peered through the windshield. “Are we gonna play basketball today?”
“I don’t see why not. You been practicing?”
“Duh! I’m just like you! I make it splash in the net!”
“Oh, word?” This kid was a trip. I loved him to death, though. “We’ll see about that when we get to your house. But before we get there, let’s get some italian ice. You still like the red kind?”
“No, I like the blue one now. The red one always messes up my shirts.”
“That’s ’cause you’re a messy kid, my dude. Your mom told me you didn’t clean your room last week, said she stepped barefoot on a LEGO. You know how much that hurts, right?”
“Yeah, I know,” he returned with a hint of sorrow. “But she asked me to do it when I was in the middle of building thebiggest LEGO tower ever, Uncle Deke!” He was upbeat again. “I still have it up, if you wanna see it!”
“Oh, I definitely wanna see that!”