Page 44 of The Lies Always Told

“My medicine bag, just like the one in my nightstand. That one stays in the car. If you look back, the black bag on the seat has my rescue meds inside. I was reckless back in the Dominican. I’m not going to do it again.”

It’s so early, the highway is practically deserted. The midnight blue sky turning into a blend of purple hues in the distance reminds me to show her the calm. She needs answers. She needs control. I can’t control my flare ups, but I can give her the tools.

“Thank you,” she whispers, sliding the bag back into the glove box, shutting the door, and resting her head back. She closes her eyes, and I take it as an invitation to turn the music on and drive.

Arriving on Amelia Island right at sunrise was perfectly timed. The hour drive from Baker Oaks here was seamless, with very little traffic. After parking and running to open Nellie’s door, I feel lightheaded as we walk down the sidewalk to the marina where the boats are docked. I don’t own a sailboat here, but I rent one from time to time when I’m homesick and don’t want to fly to the Dominican just to sail.

“Are you okay?” Nellie asks when she notices me pinching the bridge of my nose.

“Yes, I’m about to be better once we’re on the water.” I squeeze her hand and guide her up on the sailboat, where Martin already waits for us. She looks up at me with questions behind her eyes.

“I told you…I want you to feel safe. I don’t mind him here, and he can sail. If something happens, he can help. Meds in bag, Martin on deck, a phone call away for a rescue. I’m fine, I promise.”

As soon as the last words are out of my lips, she leaps into my arms, almost throwing us backward. “Easy,” I whisper into her soft hair, and she wraps me tighter in her arms.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For listening to what I said and reading between the lines.”

“Draw them for me, and I’ll follow them. Wrap your legs around me, baby girl.” She’s already in my arms, so I might as well keep her there. She does what I ask, and after I drop the bag I was carrying, I bring my hands under her ass and walk us to the deck. I sit us both on the net, and she snuggles against my chest automatically.

“As much as I love you snuggling against me, my little koala, you’re going to miss the rest of the sunrise.”

“Well, if someone wouldn’t have asked me to be awake and ready at 5:00 a.m., I wouldn’t be this tired.”

“You had your coffee, but also, look—” I point to the horizon, and she follows my gaze. Purple, blue, orange, and pink paint the sky as the wind blows our way, and Martin leads us out into the water.

“Worth it,” she says, relaxing her back against my chest and grabbing my thigh. “Damn, Gus. Your skin is so cold.”

As if on cue, goosebumps break out on my leg, and I shake the feeling that this is weird. I’m never cold, but lately, my temperature regulation has been off.

“I was missing your touch. I should warm up soon.”

She chuckles and says, “You saw me three days ago.”

“Three days too many.” She shakes her head and turns to face the horizon. I rest my chin on her head and wrap my arms around her. I like how I feel with her. I like how she feels between my legs, resting on my chest, her hands sliding up and down my leg. She feels soft and peaceful. She feels like the piece I didn’t know I was missing. She feels like tendermoments and wild times. She feels like mine, and I don’t know if she should.

We’re not going far. It takes about thirty minutes of sailing to get to Cumberland Island, where I plan for us to go. Cumberland Island is a barrier island off the coast of Georgia, only accessible by boat. It’s really close to the Amelia Island marina, and because there’s no access via land, it’s pretty private. Occasionally, people will come on their boats or on tours, but it’s rare the island is full of people. It’s not Dominican beach and sand, but it’s beautiful and peaceful.

We make it as close to the beach as we can, and Martin lowers the anchor, setting us in place. I hop down into the shallow water and open my arms for Nellie.

“Don’t let me fall.”

“Never,” I reply. She jumps down, and I, of course, catch her. She looks at me and smiles.

“My soft place to land.” She kisses my lips as her whispered words caress my heart. Yes, baby girl, I want to be that and so much more, and it’s terrifying..

“Put me down. I like the salt water on my toes.” I do carefully and nod to Martin to hand me the cooler with the food I had made for us, plus the bag with towels and my medicine.

We set up a spot by the water and sit, high enough where the towels won’t get wet, but close enough to smell the ocean. Martin stays in the cabin, giving us privacy, and I pull out the mini bento boxes.

“Adult Lunchable, I like it.”

“You loved it last time I fed you cold cuts and fruit,” I tease, and her cheeks turn rosy immediately.

“I more than liked it… Are you looking for a repeat session, because I can get on board with that.” She crosses her arms above her chest and removes the dress as soon as she finishes that sentence. Such a greedy little tease.

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