Page 88 of Destroyer

Everything became clearer in that moment. The Children, this research project, Lord D’Luc’s impending arrival, whatever was going on at the palace, even her need to prove the existence of magic… all of it was background noise, secondary, distraction.

The artifact and the devastation it had caused, the lives lost, Ru’s bare hands pressing lightly on that cold stone, Lady Maryn’s eyes before the darkness fell. And Fen. Fen, by her side since that moment, keeping her from capsizing on the wave of her anguish — These things blazed brightly, painfully, a white-hot fire in her veins. These were the moments, the things that mattered.

Anger, determination, and a sudden sense of clarity galvanized Ru. “Yes,” she said, leaning over, palms braced on the table so that her eyes were level with Inda’s. “This is accurate. Wedowant you to go away. You three are a blight on the research project, on our lives, and you’ve done nothing of worth since you arrived here. Your one contribution has been to ask for an experiment that made me sick. You’ll leave us alone to conduct our research in peace until Lord D’Luc arrives, or we will cease the work altogether. If the regent chooses to rescind funding as a result, then so be it.”

She took a long, steadying breath, trying to stop herself from shaking. “I’m going to my room now. Fen, you’re coming with me.”

As she left the table, she caught a glimpse of vague shock on the faces of the three Children — the first hint of emotion she had seen in them since their arrival. Fen stood as she passed, following her obediently from the hall without a word of protest.

As they passed Lyr on the way out, Ru shot him a single look —Don’t— and he stayed exactly where he was.

Fen said nothing until they came to a stop outside Ru’s room. He had trailed behind her like a trained predator, capable of slicing a man’s head off in a heartbeat, yet behaving as meekly as a puppy, just for Ru. Now he stood watching her as if waiting for a command.

She opened the door. “Inside.”

He obeyed without hesitation.

Slamming the door, she finally allowed her feelings, so pent-up and painful, to burn through her like wildfire, like water bursting through an opened dam. A wave of intense emotion crashed through her, battering her edges in its velocity.

And the artifact, always there, always waiting, responded. It burned in sudden response, building in her belly and vaulting upward through her bones, intoxicating her from the inside out, egging her on. Daring her.

This wasn’t what she’d wanted. She had wanted to speak to Fen, to be honest with him, she… she blinked, hard. The artifact’s caress had become a violent force, fueled by her own emotions, and she was helpless to it now.

“Sit,” she ordered, breathless.

Fen sat. He looked up at her through dark lashes, and for a moment yet another heat rose in Ru, deep in her belly, and her heart skipped.

“I’ve had enough of us avoiding each other,” said Ru, every nerve in her body reaching for Fen. “Enough awkward silences between us. It stops now.”

“You’ve been avoidingme,” Fen said. His tone wasn’t defiant, but there was a glint in his eye as he said it.

“The semantics are meaningless,” said Ru. It was hard to think… she was overheating, the inside of her skin itching, she needed… “You are a living headache, Fen Verrill. For countless reasons.”

He opened his mouth to respond.

“Don’tspeak over me.”

He closed his mouth and swallowed, his dark gaze never leaving hers.

“Better,” said Ru, trying…tryingto make the artifact relax, to push its influence away, back into the shadows of her mind as she spoke. “We need to talk. About the artifact. The Children. Lord D’Luc arriving in twodays. Fen, the artifact still…” she paused, her thoughts fuzzing as if wine were making a slow, syrupy journey through her veins.Stop that, she thought, but it wouldn’t. “Ittalksto me, in a way. I can feel its moods. It used to scare me, but now it feels almost comforting. It calms me when I’m agitated. Do I sound mad? It calls to me, Fen.”

She chewed her lip, continuing on, barreling forward because she could, because Fen was listening, because she’d let go of her feelings and now they were overwhelming her. “But when Lord D’Luc comes,” she said, “he’ll want to… to knowthe stone, to understand it. The artifactcan’tbe known or understood. Not by anyone but me, don’t you see that? The research project, these experiments, it’s all so insignificant, so irrelevant. Meaningless. What we’re looking for can’t be found with numbers, calculations, or tests. It’s in me, Fen. Me. The artifact will tell me what it wants, what its purpose is, how it works. I only have to listen.”

During this sudden flood of words, Ru had begun to pace in front of Fen. Her breaths came faster as she went, her complete conviction in what she said overwhelming all other feelings. And all the while, the artifact hummed inside her, spurring her on, her thoughts flickering in and out like a flame caught in a breeze.

Fen listened with an expression of neutrality. In the ambient light of her room, shadows cut across his face in angles, and Ru thought briefly that she had never seen anything so perfect.

“Ru,” said Fen, when she had finished. His words were low, cautious. “May I speak?”

“Fine.” She paused before him, chest heaving as if she had just run a mile.

“What do you want from me?” His expression was almost lazy as he spoke, his eyes half-lidded. As if he was reveling in this. As if, somehow, he felt as untethered as she did. The last time they had been in her room together, it had felt like this. Too much, not enough, an unclear haze between feeling and reality, brought on by the artifact.

Ru took an unsteady breath, pulling herself toward the light of rationality. Whatdidshe want from him? Support. Guidance. An ally.

“I want your honest opinion,” she said at last. “On everything I’ve just said.”

He smiled in a way that veered dangerously close to lascivious, so much that it almost knocked Ru breathless. “Am I allowed to disagree with you?”

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