Page 55 of Office of the Lost

Leopold smiled warmly at… his lover.“You know, later, when we have time?I’d be thrilled to hear about some of your collecting adventures.”

The tips of Crispin’s ears turned bright red when he blushed, which was adorable.“They’re really not that interesting.”

“I don’t believe that,” replied Leopold with complete sincerity.What he really wanted to do was lick those ear points, or maybe nibble on them, oh so gently.But again, he was practicing self-control.Master of his own domain, and all that.“So how do you find what you need in this place?”

“Usually I walk in and it’s just there.Right in front of me.But now there’s nothing in front of me but you, and you’re amazing.I like you in front of me.Or behind me.Or under me—that one’s pretty good—or….”Crispin cleared his throat.“But right now we need something to fix Thea.”He looked around, frowning.

Gently, Leopold took the phone from Crispin’s hand and stared at the screen.It was now cracked so badly that the entire thing was opaque.If they were back in Sacramento, they could take her to a cell-phone repair shop, but Leopold wasn’t sure they’d be able to deal with this big of a mess.Besides, it wasn’t just broken glass that was the problem.Hadn’t Juzir said that some Chaos had gotten into her?

Wait.Chaos.That was him.“Crispy?I don’t think we need to fix Thea at all.”

“But look at her.And if we’re going to move between places?—”

“I can do that for us, remember?”Leopold smiled at the phone.“Hey, Thea?I’m thinking that maybe you and I could work together to help fix some of the mess I’ve made.”

“We’vemade,” Crispin muttered.

But Leopold ignored him and addressed Thea again.“Do you think that would work?Without us needing to repair you, I mean?”

Thea buzzed happily, emitted a shower of sparks like a Fourth of July sparkler, and began playing a song.“Is that DonnyOsmond?”Leopold listened and recognized the song.One of his foster mothers had been a big Osmonds fan.“We Can Make It Together,” he announced triumphantly to Crispin.

Crispin reached over to give Thea a gentle pat.“All right, then.I suppose our next step is to clean things up, and probably the best place to do that is at my mother’s court.”He didn’t look remotely enthusiastic, and Leopold didn’t blame him.

“No sweat.We can do this, Crispy.I know it.”A slight stretch maybe, but sometimes a pep talk was called for, and he’d never had the chance to give one before.“The three of us are a formidable force.Like something out of a Marvel movie, but better.With Thea’s brains, your courage and organizational skills, and my, um, Chaos, we can accomplish anything.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.”Crispin took a few deep breaths and straightened his shoulders.“But we’re sure as heck going to try.Guys, please zap us to?—”

The door slammed open behind them, and they spun to see an enormous person with yellowish skin, tiny eyes, and a couple of tusklike teeth staring at them.There was a badge on a lanyard around their neck, and their houndstooth suit had actual teeth—fangs, really—instead of buttons.

“Curator Moscow!”Her bellow caused items to fall from the nearest shelves.“You’ve finally completed your assignment.It took you long enough.”She gave Leopold a once-over, her gaze dismissive, as if he were no more important than a hat rack.“Make sure you submit the paperwork promptly and properly.Your perfecality score is already in the toilet.”

Crispin swallowed audibly, mouthing “sorry” at Leopold and then stepping in front of him.“Hello, Supervisor Krönk.”

21

Crispin

This time it was Crispin’s head that felt swirly.

He’d already given up on his perfecality score—and oh how that hurt just to think it.He’d been the top curator in the department for three quarters running and had the somewhat sad but still significant blue ribbons to prove it.

And now Bidulla—he refused to think of her as his supervisor, and when in the mincing munchkins had that happened?—was about to take his beautiful bit of Chaos and stuff him into a room somewhere for all eternity.Or at least until he was needed.

Wait, that’s it!It was so obvious, he wasn’t sure why he hadn’t seen it before.He stepped in front of Leo.“I… can’t let you take him, ma’am.”

She stared at him through her huge gold-rimmed cat-eye glasses, which did nothing to soften her fearsome appearance.

“Excuse me,CuratorMoscow?”She somehow managed to imbue his title with the exact same intonation she might have used for the word forexcrement.Orchocolate.Bidulla Krönk hated chocolate.

Crispin stood firm, though his voice hemmed and hawed a bit.Have to take it out behind the woodshed and show it who was boss, later.“Well, you see, actually, he’s my necessary.”

She frowned.“Yourwhat?”

She might as well have saidYour double dark chocolate ice cream with chocolate drizzle on top?

“Mynecessary.” He tried to pull himself up to her height, aware that poor Leo was practically shaking with fear behind him.“I came here to find out what I needed for the next part of my mission, and nothing appeared.Except him.”Poor Leo.He was?—

Laughter burst out behind him.

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