Page 54 of Office of the Lost

Smiling widely, Leopold grabbed Crispin’s hand and they walked some more.And more.They passed closed gray doors, all of them stenciled with a series of numbers and letters, but didn’t stop at any of them.“What’s in those rooms?”Leopold asked.

“The Collection, of course.”

“There are a lot of rooms.”

“Oh, this is only one wing!You can’t even imagine how many items are here.OotL has been collecting for millennia, from thousands of different worlds and timelines across the Connected Worlds.I’m not even sure how big the Collection is—we have Auditors who keep track of that—but it’s enormous and growing every day.”

It reminded him of that old movie—the one where they hid the Ark of the Covenant in some dusty old warehouse at the end, so no one would ever find it.He was also reminded of how much Crispin loved his job and how proud he was of what he did, and that made him sad because now it seemed likely that Crispin would get fired.Well, you know what?If Leopold was so all-fired powerful, he ought to be able to do something about that.He had no idea what, but maybe it would come to him.For now he should be concentrating at the task at hand.Except… those doors were intriguing.

“Can I open one and peek inside?”What wonderful things must be behind those doors!

“No!”

“Just one?”Leopold fluttered his eyelashes in what he hoped was a seductive way, but he’d never actually tried that before and probably just looked as if he had something in his eye.

“Not even one.Leo, the items we collect are kept in special environments that are unique to them and suited to their preservation.You could open a door and have an ocean gush out, or you could fall into the deepest reaches of space, or?—”

“Yeah, I got it.”Honestly, he was sorely tempted to open one anyway, but he restrained himself.Which, he thought as they continued to walk, was almost a first for him.He rarely controlled his impulses.But maybe part of being really powerful was learning to use your power… well, carefully.Chaos didn’t have to be everywhere all at once.He could just sprinkle some in now and then in ways that were interesting or even helpful.As Crispin had told him, Chaos was the root of magic and of art.Maybe other things too.Like what about genetic mutations?Didn’t those happen sort of haphazardly?He remembered seeing a TV show about that once, how mutations were the source of evolutionary change.Without him, everyone would be just a single-celled bacterium floating around in the ocean.

“I’m glad we’re not bacteria,” Leopold said.

Crispin gave him a quizzical look before shrugging.“Me too.”

They passed a grand atrium that looked like a giant post office, filled with side halls containing thousands of tiny doors, each with a lock—probably where they kept some of the smaller objects.Crispin turned left, and they passed into another hall of doorways.

After another minute or so—how frigging longwasthis hallway?—Leopold asked, “What would my special environment have been?”

“Pardon me?”

“If you’d collected me and brought me back here as planned.”

“Oh.”Crispin frowned.“I have no idea.We have other fae in charge of Preservation.I’m on the Collection side.”

“Of course.”

The question kept Leopold occupied for a while, long enough for them to reach a door that was different from the others—much larger and appearing to be made of thick metal, like a bank vault.The symbol in the center of the door looked exactly like an enormous eye.It even blinked, which was disconcerting.

“Is this the Necessary Room?”

Crispin shook his head.“It’s the Oracle.”

“Oh, the one that gives orders to go collect stuff.What does the Oracle look like?”

“No idea.I’ve never seen them and I don’t know anyone who has.There are messengers who convey the Oracle’s auguries.”

This OotL place was a lot more bureaucratic than Leopold had imagined.He wondered if there were opportunities for upward mobility or lateral transfers.Before he could ask about that, though, they reached another door, this one made of what looked like ancient wood.And it had a helpful sign announcing that it was, in fact, the Necessary Room.

Crispin pushed the door inward—there was no knob—and they stepped inside.

It looked like… Target on an acid trip.Rows of shelves and racks stuffed with clothing, weapons, odd-looking machinery, fishing gear, shovels, baskets, nets, seashells, rocks, protective gear, books, kitchenware, sacks of coins, and a lot of other things that Leopold couldn’t identify.Each category of items came in a mind-blowing variety.

“Oooh… I love this place,” Leopold breathed.He could have spent years poking around, assessing what things were and how they worked.Like that reddish thing just to his right.Was it a sweater?If so, it had three arms, and he couldn’t tell?—

“I tend to find it a bit overwhelming.”Crispin was blinking, apparently taking in the disordered order of it all.

Maybe it was the disordered order that appealed to Leopold.“It’s… a lot,” he acknowledged, trying to see it from Crispin’s point of view.

“You never know what you might require.When I was sent to collect the sap from the last qebhe tree in the Swamp of Lullan, for example, I had to— Well, it doesn’t matter right now.”

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