Page 2 of Office of the Lost

“You’ll leave tonight.With your… skills”—she said it as if there was still some doubt as to whether he possessed any—“you should be able to convince the subject to return with you forthwith.”

If the Oracle wanted himandthe job was stamped top priority, it must really be important.I should feel honored.“All right.I’ll go forthwith and… wait, what?”The final word ascended into an upper pitch that only canines could usually hear.

She stared at him as if he’d gone daft.

His mind raced.She wanted him to leave tonight, without a proper bath, without saying goodbye to Minkis, and to collect asomeone?Not a something?This is all going too quickly.“May I ask what is so urgent about this particular recovery?”

She sighed, which would have blown his carefully completed paperwork out of his outbox if it hadn’t already sparked and vanished into the archival vaults.“I’m not at liberty to tell you that.Suffice it to say that this mission is of the utmost importance.Make this happen and you have a very bright career ahead of you, Curator Moss’caladin.”She said it right that time, leading him to believe she’d known it all along.Ogres did love their games.

Left unsaid was what would likely happen to him if he failed.It would be back to the forest for him, hunting deer and learning sword-craft with his know-it-all older brother.He shuddered.“I’ll do my best, ma’am.”There, that was better.He’d managed to get an entire sentence out without his voice cracking.

He signed the paperwork, and with ading, a copy appeared inside Thea, his portable transport device that had somehow survived the ogre assault on his desk.

“See that you do.”She got up, and the far end of his desk settled back to the ground with a smallcrash.“I expect great things from you, Moscow.”With that, she turned and made her way, with far more agility than he would have expected, across the crowded room, her staff trailing behind her like a cloud of gypsy moths.

“But you said if I needed anything….”But she and her attendants were gone.

“Very well then.”He’d never heard of a recovery mission for abeing.Once he brought them back to OotL, would they be stuffed into the vault next to the collected diamonds and wands and other important bric-a-brac?Or would Her Ogreness come to collect them personally, leading them off somewhere without an explanation?

Not my responsibility.Crispin frowned.He liked things neat and tidy, and this case was shaping up to be anything but.

He opened the folder.Inside was a brief description of the subject—a Leopold Lane, who looked more like a Leo than a Leopold.Good enough looking, if a bit unkempt for Crispin’s tastes, dark hair in contrast to Crispin’s blond.

Thea whistled.“Handsome, though he’s a bit scruffy for you.”

“He’s a recovery asset.Not interested.”Then he saw the destination world.

Earth.

His heart sank.

No one liked to go there.It was loud and dirty and filled with inefficiency and redundancy.Very little magic remained, largely because it had been mostly stamped out by the horde of smelly humans who seemed dead set on ruining their world before anyone else could get around to it.

He’d been there a few times to collect lost things, and every time afterward he’d needed a three-hour soak in his blue ceramic bathtub to clean off the grit and the anxiety that clung to him.

In and out, quick.That’s how it would be.Then he’d be home to Minkis in time for a midnight meal.

He headed for the Necessary Room to collect whatever he would need.In half an hour, he was packed and in the Hall of Mirrors, ready to effectuate the mission and keep his perfecality score above ten-point-oh.

2

Leopold

The dime rolled off the counter, bounced on the tile floor, and rolled under the bakery case.

Ignoring the glares and aggrieved sighs of the people in line behind him, Leopold fished around in his jacket pockets in search of more coins.

“You can just tap your phone right here to pay.”The short blonde barista pointed perkily.She was the type who did everything perkily.Leopold was willing to bet she even managed to be perky when she was asleep, which for some reason annoyed him to no end.

“I’d rather not.”He didn’t find another dime, but eventually he unearthed a nickel and five pennies, along with an expired light-rail ticket, a crumpled but probably unused Kleenex, and a metal screw-looking thing that looked as if it was probably an important part of something but he didn’t know what.He set down the coins and shoved the rest back into his pockets.

“We have an app,” chirped the barista.“You can download it for free and use it to pay for your orders.And you earn points!Which you can use to get free coffees and stuff.”

“I don’t have a phone.”

She blinked at him as if he’d suddenly sprouted a few extra heads.

And although it wasn’t really any of her business, Leopold shrugged.“It broke.”

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