Page 30 of Sex. Love. Marriage.
She smiles, shivering at my touch and then sighs. “Oliver, don’t hurt her. That iPad is hers too. You guys need to share.”
“I was watching it first,” he snaps, rolling his eyes.
As Hazel’s picking herself up off the ground, refusing to cry over her big brother being a dick, I take a package of fruit snacks off the counter and toss it at Oliver’s head. It hits him right in the ear. He turns to me, shocked I threw something at him. “Lose the attitude, O.”
His eyes narrow, his shoulders tensing, but he says nothing. He knows he won’t get anywhere with me, acting like that. When Hazel’s back in the chair, she sticks her tongue out at him. “You’re so mean to me.”
“Because I don’t like you,” Oliver whispers to her.
I hate how mean he is to her, but nothing Kelly or I say to him changes it. He was never like this with Mara. I’m not sure if it’s his way of coping, or if he’s just going through being a ten-year-old. They’re dicks sometimes.
With my proximity to Kelly, Fin takes a drink from her bottle; I know what’s coming and back up a foot before she can spit on me. “Don’t even think about it,” I warn, refusing to change my shirt this morning. You’d be amazed how hard it is to get dressed with one hand.
“Will your hand be okay at work?”
I glance down at the splint on my hand. “It’s fine,” I mumble and then kiss the kids goodbye. Kelly offers her own mumbled goodbye and a quick kiss on the cheek, but it’s brief and forced. I’ve pissed her off again. Just before I leave, I reach the edge of the counter, the same counter I fucked her against last night and realize I shouldn’t leave like this. Not again. She deserves something even if I can’t offer her much else. So I turn, lean in and whisper, “I love you,” to her, because I know she wants to hear it.
Kelly’s lips quirk up into a smile, soft and gentle. “I love you.”
Once I’m in my truck, a sharp pain hits me that this is what I do to her constantly. I walk away. I push my feelings and words I can’t say away, and I do what I know how to—provide for our family.
I hate arguing. I don’t see the point in it. My dad was a yeller and constantly screamed at me to get his point across. I never heard any of it. Too many times the wrong words get said, and you’re left doing more explaining than actually communicating.
I jump at the sound of someone tapping on the window. It’s Bonner. I still want to kill him. I roll down the window. “Go away. I’m still mad at you.”
With a cup of coffee in one hand, he tosses a warning notice at me from the HOA. “They left this on your door this morning. I say we go take a shit on HOA lady’s doorstep.”
I rip the notice up and toss it on the floorboard of my truck. “Thanks for watching the kids.”
He brings the cup in his hand to his lips, smiling, his sky-blue eyes squinting into the direct sun peeking over the roof of our house. Holding up his hand, he blocks the light and tips his head forward. “No problem. How’s the hand?”
I start my truck up. “Fucked.”
“Sucks. Hey, come over when you get home.”
“Why, so you can give me a little blue happy pill again?” Can you sense the sarcasm in my voice?
Bonner can, and he snorts, rolling his eyes. His hand drops to my truck, and he knocks his fist against it. “No, I have something better for you.”
I roll my eyes. I don’t even want to know.
WORK SUCKS. WORKINGfor your brother sucks and being a mechanic with one hand fucking blows. I’ll tell you what else blows. Today’s working youth. You wouldn’t believe how many kids out there, the Bonner Slades of the world who are holding down jobs, but just barely. I don’t know Bonner well enough to know if he is one of these kids, but his age group isn’t doing my judgment of him any favors. I just hope I’m raising my kids better than this, that they don’t turn out like assholes. There’s an excuse for everything with these guys. I need a break because I’m stressed out. I need a smoke because I’m stressed out. My dog puked last night… I need the day off. And my favorite, I just bought a new motorcycle. I need a raise. You should have thought about that before you bought it!
Where I came from, you got up at the asscrack of dawn and your day didn’t end until that sun went down. Every single day. It wasn’t like the cattle or any part of the ranch could wait until I finished vaping or checked Instagram for the latest drama. Hell, in Texas, I didn’t even know where my cell phone was most days and vaping, what the fuck is that?
Remember when I said you’d meet Nick? Now’s that time. He comes into the shop about ten, which is when he finally decides to show up for the day. Must be nice owning the dealership, you can just show up whenever you feel like it. I tell myself every day I’m going to open up my own shop and it’s days like this I think, yep, today’s the day I’m going to do it. I’m going to quit and open up my own place where I don’t have to rely on anyone else.
Only I don’t because I’m the kind of guy who hates change. I don’t hold out because I’m scared, or anything like that. I just like routine.
Nick walks through the door and immediately sees my hand. It’s pretty fucking noticeable with the ridiculous cast they stuck on it. “Whoa, what happened?”
“Broke it,” I mumble, trying to change a head gasket on a Honda with one hand. It’s not impossible, but not easy either.
“Shouldn’t you be at home then?”
I gesture around the shop. “And rely on these little fuckers you have in here to do the job?”
Nick nods. He knows exactly what I’m talking about but doesn’t do anything to fix it. We argue about it all the time, every day. And then a tall blonde comes walking in behind Nick, smiling at me. “I want to introduce you to someone,” he says, gesturing to the woman. “This is Ava Duncan. She’s our new head of sales.”
