Page 34 of Trading Paint

“I hadnothingto do with that,” I defended. “That was Spencer, not me.”

Sway and I started laughing at the memories of Tommy singing half-naked in her yard. We usually kept the drinking and partying to Saturday nights after races but last night “Fire Crotch” as Sway called him, lost his virginity to KateClemming, his longtime girlfriend.

When Mrs. Gunner walked in our conversations drifted away and Chelsea finally took her own seat. Like I said, we’d dated off and on and right nowwasa maybe on, maybe off. I hadn’t decided.

She drove me fucking insane most days and I couldn’t tell you why I even tolerated her but I did. I think the reason I dated her was to give Sway a chance at a normal dating life. When other men became interested in her, they turned to me thinking I was her boyfriend, which I wasn’t.

Thinking back on it, dating Chelsea was more about letting Sway be her own person. I didn’t want to stand in the way of her happiness and I knew I couldn’t offer her anything more than a friendship and I sure as shit wasn’t offering anything more than physical needs to Chelsea.

Chelsea was different from Sway in many ways. For one, Sway was a rebel and did whatever the fuck she wanted and when she wanted whereas Chelsea was straight-laced. You’d think this straight-laced side would keep her from wanting to have sex but no. We constantly had the same argument all the time. She wanted to, I didn’t.

Now it’s not that I didn’t want to have sex because let’s face it, I was seventeen. I wanted to have sex in the worse way but I didn’t want to with Chelsea. I was convinced that she had an ulterior motive, like trapping me and I wasn’t attracted to her in that way. Sadly, Sway was the one I wanted.

There were plenty of times when Sway and I could have acted on my hormonal flare-ups but she deserved more than that. Sway needed a man who’d be there for her, not one that wanted racing and racingonly.

I knew I’d never give myself entirely to Chelsea or any other woman. Sure, we’d probably end up having sex...I am a teenage boy, it was bound to happen. But I knew beyond high school, I didn’t want anything from Chelsea. I’m not sure I wanted anything from any woman besides Sway—I needed her friendship.

Racing was all I wanted to do and that meant giving up a normal life and everything that went with a normal life.Friends.Girlfriends.Normal shit that teenagers did.

Class ended and Chelsea was attached to my hip while Tommy and Sway pushed each other out the door.

“If you didn’t fuckclammerlast night, I’d think you were gay.” Sway told him.

“At least I didn’t spread my legs for Cooper.” His smile widened. “He’s probably slept with half the girls in this high school now.”

Sway punched his shoulder, hanging her head dejectedly. “Fuck offfire crotch!”

Without another glance, she trudged away, sadness evident on her features.

“What was that about?” I asked Tommy once we were outside. Chelsea was still clinging to my side.

“You didn’t know she fucked Cooper after prom when you were in Chico last weekend?”

“Jameson,come on.” She tugged on my arm. “Who cares who Sway fucks? Come on!”

“Come on what?” I threw my arms up, irritated. Not only was I irritated she was clinging to me but the fact that Sway never said anything about what happened with Cooper had severely me pissed off.

“I thought we could go to my house for lunch.” She smiled tugging again. “Please?”

I looked past her morosely to see Sway sitting on my tailgate, staring at her feet in the parking lot.

“I can’t.” I told her removing her arm from mine. “I have to drop my fuel pump at Frank’s shop and then I need to stop by Glen’s and pick up my springs before Saturday.”

“You can do that tonight or Saturday morning.”

“No I can’t. I race on Saturday in Cottage Grove. I’m leaving early Saturday morning before they open and I need to test the set up tonight.”

“I thought we were going to the movies Saturday.” She pouted in that annoying voice she had when she was trying to be adorable.

“No, I never said I was going. I told you when you asked that I had a race.” My voice was getting heated. She never listened when I talked about racing which is why she didn’t know I would be in Cottage Grove tomorrow. “It’s not my problem you didn’t listen.”

“Can’t you blow off the boys then and hang out with me tonight.” She reached for me again. “Why do you need to race in Cottage Grove anyway?”

“Chelsea,” I shook my head taking a step back. “I made plans with my friends tonight and then I’m leaving in the morning. I can’t hang out with you tonight.”

“So you’re choosing your friends over me?”

“I shouldn’t have to choose.” I told her walking away.

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