Page 55 of How to Deal

Jade is practicing her new routine for her dance to Lollipop. I don’t even know Jade’s last name or even if Jade is her real name, but she’s great to talk to and makes killer nachos.

I’m lying on the floor, watching her rehearse. She has mad moves, and I’m captivated. Even Oliver is entertained by it and watches her intently. It’s way past his bedtime, but he’s mesmerized.

“You don’t remember?” she finally asks, a little winded. I’d been discussing the recent turn of events with her and waiting for her to reply. “That sucks.”

“I wasn’t exactly in my ‘right mind’ that night.” I roll over on her wooden floor, propping myself up on my elbows.

“Well, from what I remember, you left shortly before I left with the football player. What was his name?”

I gasp. “You left with Aldon?”

“Not really the point here. You left with that Batman guy.” Her eyes widen that she remembers—Jade doesn’t remember shit. Last week I had to remind her which apartment was hers when she tried to unlock my door and started throwing a hissy fit when her key wouldn’t work.

“Do you remember what he looked like?”

“Not really, but Aldon said something about it being his best friend.” Then she tips her head. “He had brown eyes. I remember that.”

Holy shit! I did sleep with him.

With Oliver in tow, I run out of Jade’s apartment and into my own. I remember bits and pieces of that night. I practically raped poor Batman in the hallway. The only reason we made it in my apartment was because he stopped us and pushed me inside.

Too bad I don’t remember if it was good or not. Who am I kidding? It was probably fantastic.

When you think about it, I’m the whore, not him! I raped Batman!

“What do I do now?” I ask, looking down at Oliver.

He doesn’t answer me as he’s now fast asleep on my lap.

I smell like chlorine, so I take a shower before bed. When I’m out of the shower, I hear a commotion outside my door, so I open it. There is no one there, but when I look down to get Oliver back inside, fresh off a midnight nap, there’s a single red rose with a note attached to it.

Tathan isn’t in the hall, which throws me a wicked curveball of amazement. Oliver takes off with the rose and leaves me standing at the door with the note in my hand.

“I am a whore,” I tell Oliver, who sits next to me against the door, eating his rose.

He doesn’t answer me.

Why do I find the fact that Tathan wrote me a note so incredibly endearing and heartfelt? I hate to even say those words associated with Tathan in the same sentence, but I do.

Damn him and his note. It’s my breaking point, because how can I throw office supplies at a man who writes notes and gives me roses?

It’s two in the morning on Friday, but I call in the Crisis Campers, Casey and Zane. Though this is essentially a bad idea, I need someone to talk to who answers back.

We sneak over to the gas station across the street for ice cream, and return to my apartment just a few minutes later. I’m getting a piggyback ride from Zane through the lobby of my apartment complex. I’d convinced him my feet hurt from pole dancing with Jade and he needed to carry me.

“You fucked him?” Zane asks, snickering. “You lucky bitch, muff!”

I bite his ear. “Can you not act like a twelve-year-old for like five minutes? This is serious.”

“Not likely. Hey, look.” He points to a vending machine. “Do you have a dollar? And I’m staying up all night for you. Don’t bite me.”

Reaching into the pocket of my shorts, I retrieve a dollar and hand it to him over his shoulder. He takes the dollar where he inserts it into the machine as I lay my head on his back. He gets his peanut M&M’s and starts walking toward the elevators.

“I don’t see what the big deal is. So muff got some action and doesn’t remember. . .” He shrugs. “What’s the problem?”

Casey catches up with us after getting her own bag of M&M’s. “The problem is—” She opens her bag and pops two green ones in her mouth. “—she doesn’t want him toknowthat she doesn’t remember. Is that right?”

I nod. “Can you nosy nellies focus? What am I going to do? He wrote a note?”

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