Page 66 of Free to Fall

I hit the ground, slow. The last thing I remember was her face hovering over mine, blurred by tears. I felt cold, so fucking cold. But even through the pain, I held onto that ultrasound picture. Blood on my fingertips. My hand curled tight around that tiny photo of our baby.

I looked up at her, heart hammering out of my chest. “I love you…”

Then everything went black.

18

EGYPT

The ambulance lights painted the street in a blur of red and white. People were outside, phones up, snapping pictures, yelling out my name. But all I could focus on was Nasseem.

He hadn’t opened his eyes since he hit the ground.

I sat on the edge of the gurney beside him, gripping his bloody hand with both of mine as the EMTs shouted vitals and orders back and forth. His blood soaked through my clothes, warm and sticky. The machines hooked up to him beeped and clicked, showing that he was still alive…at least for now.

“Pressure’s low, but we’re holding. We need to move,” one EMT barked the moment we made it to the hospital not long after. I didn’t let go of his hand until I was forced to when they snatched the gurney from the ambulance and wheeled him inside of the building.

“Ma’am, you okay?” a nurse asked me, placing her hand on my shoulder.

“That’s his blood,” I muttered numbly. “All his?—”

“No, baby girl,” she said, cutting me off. “Look down.”

I followed her eyes and saw it—streaks of deep crimson between my legs. The fabric of my pants was drenched in blood, and the smell hit me all at once. Metallic, sharp, real.

“No,” I whispered. My voice cracked. “No, no, no?—”

I barely had time to scream before the whole world tilted and everything went dark.

I wokeup in a hospital bed. My mouth was dry, my body aching. Light filtered through the blinds, casting sharp lines across the room. My stomach felt hollow, my heart even more so.

“Hey, you’re awake,” a soft voice said beside me.

I turned slowly. Serenity and Averi were sitting in chairs, both of their eyes red and swollen. Their makeup was smudged, their faces pale. Averi reached for my hand. “You scared the shit outta us.”

I tried to speak but couldn’t.

“You passed out in the ER,” Serenity said gently. “You were bleeding really bad.”

I looked down again, saw the IV in my arm, the heart monitor beside me, the sterile gown I was in. The memory of Nasseem on the ground, blood pouring from him, my own legs wet with warmth—everything came crashing back…

“The baby—” I choked.

Serenity nodded slowly, her eyes glossing with tears. “Egypt…”

A doctor stepped in then, saving her from having to say it. He looked tired, but kind. “Miss Armstrong,” he began, “I’m so sorry, but you miscarried. The trauma and stress?—”

I didn’t hear the rest. I just fell apart. My body curled into itself, a raw sob ripping through my throat. I felt Averi’s armsaround me, Serenity pressing a hand to my back, but I was somewhere else—lost, broken, completely shattered.

I couldn’t breathe.

Not my baby. Not our baby.

The doctor waited before continuing, speaking only when I finally calmed into soft hiccups. “We need to perform a D&C?—”

“What’s that?” I croaked.

“It’s a dilation and curettage procedure,” he explained gently. “It’ll allow us to remove any remaining pregnancy tissue to avoid infection or complications. We recommend doing it within the next twenty-four hours.”

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