Page 9 of In Her Shadow

“What? That doesn’t make sense.” His eyes stare over me in confusion.

“Do you trust me?” I ask him again, desperate to feel his lips back on mine, and his hands… I want to know how they would feel on my body.

“Of course, I trust you. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Then come with me.” I take his hand, and when I start leading him over toward the bed, his eyebrows raise in shock, but he doesn’t stop me.

“I don’t even know your name, but I have this overwhelming urge inside me to trust you.” I stand in front of him and begin trying to explain. “Things have happened to me, things I try to forget. I’ve been touched by people who I never gave my permission to. I was young, and they were people I trusted, so it really hurt.” I feel my tears starting to form, and swallow themdown, because I will not let those people destroy anything else. “I’m givingyoupermission.” I don’t know if I should take the way his mouth drops open as a good or a bad sign, but I carry on regardless. “I want you to touch me. I even think I want you to take what I’ve felt the need to protect so fiercely for all this time.” I quickly lift off my dress, standing before him in myjust-in-caseunderwear and waiting for him to make the next move.

He stares at me for so long I can’t decide if he’s going to devour me or rush out the door. He looks angry,fiercely angry, and just when I think he’s going to cut and run, I hear a low, predatory growl come from his throat. Then, stepping closer, he grabs a fistful of my hair and slams his lips back onto mine.

REN

I’m breaking every rule. I’ve fallen victim to temptation, but it feels too fucking good for me to care. Kissing Eloise is every bit as good as I imagined it would be…and some.

“This is a bad idea,” I growl against her lips, reminding myself not to claw at her as my fingers slide up her back. Her skin is clammy, she’s bound to be nervous, yet the determination in her eyes convinced me of how much she wants this.

I have no idea why she doesn’t fear me. I can deny it to her all I want, but she knows I’ve been following her. She knows, and yet she still trusts me. I pull her face away from mine using the grip I have on her long, brown hair. I need to see that determination again just to be sure. She’s breathless, her lips are swollen from where I’ve tarnished them, but she’s smiling.

“Probably, but I don’t want to back out, do you?” She stares at me hopefully, and I feel my restraint snap all over again. I rush my lips back onto hers, kissing her deep, and when I lose a little of my restraint and bite down on that plump bottom lip, she moans.

“I’m not the kinda guy to have your first time with,” I warn. Because as much as I want to be the one who takes her purity, I’m not what she needs.

“Why not?” Her fingertips touch me through the fabric of my tee, and I grab her wrists to halt the path they make toward my jeans.

“I’ll hurt you,” I tell her in a frustrated whisper, realizing that my hands are shaking from all the tension that years and years of wanting have built up inside me.

“Isn’t it supposed to hurt, anyway?” She looks up at me, all innocent and sassy at the same time.

“This isn’t a fucking game.” I feel my grip tighten. “What if I told you I’d thought about it?” I tease her lips with mine, not quite letting them touch, and seeing her lick her lips like she’s desperate to taste them again, drives me even crazier. “What if I told you that I’ve imagined how pretty my bruises would look on your skin?” I move my hand and wrap it around her throat, squeezing her a little tighter than I should. “What if I confessed that I’ve come all over these fingers just from thinking about the sound you’d make if I choked you?” I whisper, feeling her body shiver against mine.

“I’mnotscared of you,” she tells me firmly, and when I slowly release my fingers and trail them down her body, I take the time to appreciate every inch of her goosepimpled skin. Her stomach is toned and flat from all the yoga she does at the weekends, and like so many times before, I imagine how it would look round and swollen. Eloise looks so pretty with my child growing inside her. I know this because I’ve drawn it a thousand times. I can’t even imagine how satisfying it would be to possess and own her body in that way. To watch it flourish as it carries something the two of us made together.

I slip my fingers lower, and she holds her breath when they skim into the waistline of her panties.

“We need a safe word for you, Kitten.” I breathe into her ear, tracing my nose over her cheek, and absorbing more of her scent

“What's a safe wo–”

“It’s a word you say if you need me to stop.” I plant a soft kiss on her temple. “I’m going to try and be gentle. But I’m also going to own you. I’m gonna overpower you, and if atanytime it gets too much, all you have to do is say that word, and it all stops without hesitation.

“So, it’s kind of like a tap out.” She smiles, having no idea what she’s getting herself into.

“Yeah, it’s a tap out.” I keep my hand where it is, desperate to slide it lower and touch that precious, little pussy, but I won’t until I know her safeword.

Eloise is trusting me; she needs to know that she’s in control of her boundaries.

“Then why don’t we just use that?” She looks down to where my fingers are tucked into her lace, then back up at me.

“If I want you to stop, I say ‘Tap Out.’” She gives me a tiny nod as the all clear before I slide my hand lower and glide my middle finger through the seam of her pussy.

She gasps again, and I graze her ear lobe with my teeth when I realize how wet she is. If this is how good she feels on my finger, I can’t eventhinkabout how incredible she’s going to feel on my cock.

I keep my finger stroking her softly, then decide to test her a little when I pinch her clit, between my thumb and finger. She doesn’t flinch, she purrs for me, just like I knew she would. “That’s right, Kitten, earn your name, purr for me again.” I pinch a little tighter and see a spark of thrill in her eyes before releasing her and making gentle circles to soothe the pain I might have caused.

“You want me to use these fingers to stretch you a little before you take my cock?” I’m desperate to know how tight she is. I've spent hours with my fist clenched tight around my dick trying to replicate it.

“That might be a good idea.” Her bottom lip wobbles like she’s nervous, and I trace a circle around her tight, virgin hole. “You can say the word anytime. I’ll stop right away. Remember,you'rein control,” I whisper as I steadily slip two fingers inside her. She holds her breath again, squeezing her eyes shut tight as her warm, wet channel crushes my fingers. I keep making those lazy circles with my thumb against her clit, to distract her from any discomfort and when she looks at me and smiles I can’t help wondering what’s going through her head.

---