Page 43 of In Her Shadow

“You don’t get to use that to your advantage. Tell me what you did, Ren.” I look at him fearfully.

He lowers his head as he pulls out his phone and holds it up in front of me, and I’m stunned when I see a view of the inside of my apartment on the screen.

“Whatisthis?”

“Just wait.” He closes his eyes.

“No, Ren, I won’t wait. Do you have cameras in my apartment? You know how sick that is, rig—” I go silent when I see the front door open and someone in a motorcycle helmet step inside.

“Who is that?” I ask, watching as the stranger in my house starts looking through my things.

“I don’t know, but he was there a while, and he was looking for something. I was hoping you might know what that something is?”

“Ren, I don’t have a clue.” I start to cry again.

“Hey, hey, don’t cry. You're safe here, and I’m not gonna let anything happen to you. I’m not the little boy who used to sit under your window and let shit happen anymore.”

“You killed Mr. Connor, too, didn’t you?” I need to hear him say it.

“I’ve killed every single person that’s ever hurt you, that's how it’s always gonna be. I’m just hoping that having you close, and you being mine, means fewer people have to die.”

I have no idea how, but I’m pretty sure he just made murder sound romantic.

I’mtotallyblaming the pregnancy hormones for that.

“How long have the cameras been in my home, Ren?” My voice comes out shaky.

“Ever since you moved in,” he admits. “And I know how wrong it is.” His fingertips dance across my neck. “But Iliveto watch you. I needed to know everything. I wanted to be in your life so desperately that I did desperate things.”

“Then why did you never try? You could have just come up to me and said ‘hey, how’s it going?’.”

“I explained all this. Look at you, you're everything that's right about the world and I’m everything that's wrong…I’m–”

“Ren, you’re–”

“I killed your father, Eloise!” He blurts the words out, like he’s been holding on to them for far too long, and all I can do is stare back at him, stunned.

“No.” I shake my head fiercely.

“I know that you hate him for what he did, but I also know that, deep inside you, there’s a little girl who still loves the man he was before.”

“You're wrong,” I tell him sternly.

“Then why do you put flowers on his grave when it’s his birthday?” he questions me.

“My father killed himself when I went to college. He realized all he’d done was wrong, and hekilled himself. I read the note.”

“I made him write that note,” Ren admits, knowing that his words will hurt me. I guess that's what I signed up for when I said I wanted the truth.

“Why? Why not kill him the way you did Luca?”

“Because you deserved that apology, whether it was fake or not,” he tells me. “You needed closure to move on and have a happy life, and that’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”

“Please tell me that's everything.” I feel exhausted, and the fact that I’m finding the lengths Ren has gone to to keep me safe must mean I’m as crazy as he is.

“There’s just one more thing I need to confess before I untie you…” His mouth moves closer, kissing me as he lowers down my body. Slowly, he unbuttons the front of the shirt dress I’m wearing, opening it up to expose my underwear, and when those kisses reach my stomach, he looks up at me and smiles. “This baby we’re having wasn’t an accident.” He presses his lips against my flat tummy and makes it flutter.

REN

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