Page 18 of In Her Shadow

“It wasn’t a problem,” I tell her, wanting to move off the subject as fast as possible. Deceiving her doesn’t make me feel good about myself. I should be giving her more time, allowing this to progress naturally, the way normal people do. But we’re not normal people, and my reasons for wanting to knock her up aren’t just selfish. I can protect Eloise much better if we’re together. I want to be in her life now, not just watching it. Having kids is all part of her big plan. I’m just ensuring she gets one a little sooner than she anticipated, and that I'm part of that plan, too.

André came through for me while she was at work today. The Plan B she took earlier was a fake, and those contraceptive pills she’ll be taking each day will be doing nothing to protect her womb from my plans for our future.

“I really can’t believe I was so stupid last night,” she laughs awkwardly.

“Not as stupid as you were tonight, you should never have left that club by yourself. This city isn’t safe,” I remind her, standing close behind her so I can inhale the scent of her hair as she opens the door to her apartment. Since making her mine, I can feel my obsession for her getting even more out of control, and I’m starting to wonder what its limits are.

“It is when you have your very own personal bodyguard.” She turns to face me, showing me that sweet smile that makes me want to pin her to the door and fuck her all over again.

“Make yourself at home,” she tells me, heading straight for the kitchen and stretching her body to reach up to the cupboard for a glass so she can pour herself a glass of water.

“Can I get you a nightcap?” she offers, and after I shake my head to decline, she takes a seat on the couch. Meanwhile, I stand hovering like a spare part, not really knowing where I fit.

“Take a seat.” She strokes the space beside her. “I think we should talk.”

“Sure.” I do as she asks, resting beside her and trying to loosen up. I know she’s gonna have questions. Questions that I’ve been avoiding giving her answers to. There's no way to make the extremes I’ve gone to sound anything other than psychotic, and I don’t want to ruin all this by scaring her.

“This…whatever it is, feels like it’s moving so fast.” She laughs nervously as she sips her water, then places it on the table. “I guess… I just want to know more about you. You did say you kneweverythingabout me,” she reminds me.

“What do you want to know?” I slide my arm along the back of the couch behind her and lean my lips into hers so I can tease them a little.

“I don’t know, just general things.” She doesn’t take the bait. “Like, what you do for a job, where you grew up.” She shrugs, swallowing a lump in her throat as her eyes drop down to my mouth like she’s tempted.

“I don’t really have a job. I earn enough to get by from making investments. And I grew up not far from here, just outside the city.” I keep things vague.

“Do your folks still live nearby?” she asks curiously.

“My folks are dead,” I answer, giving in to temptation myself and kissing her lips. They’re still a little stained from the blood she drew from my hand, and crimson is a beautiful shade on her.

“I’m sorry. Guess we’re not so different after all.” She reaches up to touch my face, and her fingertips feel so soft and delicate.

“We’re very different,” I whisper, sliding my hand behind her ear and dragging her back onto my lips.

“Ren.” She forces me back. “We need to figure this out.”

“What's there to figure out?” I ask her, still trying to distract her from delving too deeply into this.

“I don’t know how this is supposed to work. I’m not exactly experienced when it comes to dating, and now that we kind of are, does that mean you stop following me?” I detect a little panic in the tone of her cute little ramble.

“Not a chance.” I smile back at her darkly. “Especially not after tonight's performance. If anything, I’d say I’m gonna have to keep a closer eye on you,” I warn.

“Why me, Ren?” I love the way my name sounds coming off her lips and how pretty she looks when she’s all confused. This girl really has no idea how special she is.

“Whynotyou?” I shrug.

“Come on, at least give me something.” She rolls her eyes impatiently. “I can feel all these changes happening to me, and I know you're the reason for them. You were right when you said what I did tonight was stupid, and the old me would never have taken such a risk. Knowing you're watching me doesn’t freak me out the way it should, it makes me…” She shakes her head and laughs at herself.

“Go on,” I encourage her, desperately wanting to be inside her head. To know her thoughts, instead of having to guess them.

“It makes me feel kind of powerful,” she admits, taking my hand and interlinking her fingers with mine. “I want to understand all this better. But right now, I don’t even understand myself.”

I didn’t know it was possible for someone to look so excited and scared at the same time.

“Maybe you don’t need to understand it.” I lean my body over hers, forcing her to lie back on the couch. “I know what's good for you, Kitten.” It’s a shame she won’t know what that is until it’s too late. My seed will be planted inside her, and her body will convince her to love the precious little thing that grows in her womb. Watching Eloise for so long has shown me countlessevidence of how kind and nurturing she is. She’ll make the perfect mother to our child.

“How long have you been watching me, Ren?” Her voice is just a weak whisper, and when I kiss her, she doesn’t pull away from me; she lets me distract her. Maybe deep down, Eloise is as scared of hearing my answers as I am of giving them to her.

“Do you want to stay here tonight?” This time, when she pulls away, she asks the question that I want to hear.

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