Page 37 of What's Left of Me

I squeezed him lightly. “Yep, that’s me. A heavy, rusty anchor.”

Phoenix sniggered, which made me happy. I wanted this to help him, not pull him under.

“Ready?” Aziza asked. He looked up at me, and I grinned.

“You got this.”

He nodded and she began. At first it was just her telling him to listen to her. Each passing minute, I could feel him sinking deeper. It was almost hard for me to stay focused as I wanted to close my eyes, but she really seemed to know how to home in on this being about him, and so I kept holding him as he slunk into the darkness, back into that shed with that man…that voice.

I wanted to tear through it all and yank him out and beat the memory to dust so it could never hurt him ever again.

“Phoenix, remember, Noel and I are right there with you. This isn’t real, just a memory. Can you tell me what you’re feeling?”

“I feel Noel.”

I glanced at her, worried that this was going to be a problem, but she waved the concern off.

“Good, hold on to him. What are you seeing?”

“The shed. A room, it’s small. It’s where I stay with him.”

I clenched my jaw.Stay…?No, he’d never be back there.

“Can you smell anything?”

“Earth…it’s weird, like clean dirt?”

She hummed. “Makes sense. Do you hear anything?”

He was silent for a beat. “Crunching, like leaves, a sliding sound.”

He’d been in the woods, so that tracked. Wasn’t sure what the sliding sound was, though.

“Like someone is walking on leaves, or the wind is rustling them?” she asked.

“Walking.” His voice shook, and I could feel the tremble in his bones. I pulled him closer, silently telling him I was there.

“Is it him, Phoenix?”

He nodded. “He’s here.”

“He’s not there, Phoenix. It’s a memory, and he can’t hurt you. Feel Noel. Can you do that?”

He gripped the fabric of my shirt so tightly, his nails bit into my flesh. I covered his hand with mine so he knew I was there, but I kept silent.

“I feel him.”

“Your anchor, hold him and you’ll be safe.”

She gave Phoenix a moment, and soon he relaxed into me. I was having a difficult time containing my rage for this monster. I had to take a few deep breaths myself, which didn’t go unnoticed by Aziza.

“Now, Phoenix, in this memory, he’s going to come inside. I just want you to pay attention to details, his voice, how he holds himself. Remember, he can’t touch you.”

“Okay.”

“He enters the shed; what’s the first thing you notice about him?”

“His mask. It’s on. He just looks at me, says nothing.”

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