Page 6 of Resist

“You’re so sweet.” She steps forward and stumbles on her high heels.

“Whoa, I’ve got you.” Ryker catches her as she trips, her hand landing on his chest, and she giggles as she strokes it.

“Wow, your muscles . . .”

He grins down at her. “How about we find somewhere for you to sit, and I can get a drink as well?”

“I know a place,” she gushes, taking his hand and suddenly able to walk now. She winks back at me as she leads Ryker away, and he doesn’t even spare me a look.

I stare after him, and I realize very rapidly that this is what our life will be like—me staring after him, wishing I were on his arm while he fucks his way through Hollywood.

My heart clenches so hard I struggle to breathe, hoping he’ll turn back and prove me wrong. I just want things to be the way they were, but I’m starting to think they never will be.

“I need a fucking drink,” I mutter.

I make my way through the party. Barely anyone pays me any mind, since I’m a nobody to them. We might be making waves, but these people are the gods above us. I grab a bottle of Jack and wander the ground floor, finding Dash and Strike playing games with other people at a poker table. I watch for a little bit before wandering around, looking for him.

Where could he be?

I tell myself it’s just to make sure he’s okay, but when I finally find him, my heart sinks and I wish I had never looked. He’s surrounded by women on a sofa deep in the house, his head thrown back as he laughs. Their hands slide over his body possessively, their nails scraping his arms and chest.

Taking a massive drink, I swish it in my mouth as bitterness fills me, then I turn away before I do something stupid. I head through some closed sliding doors, leaning against the railing on a balcony overlooking a huge backyard.

I sip the bottle as I let the fresh air try to wash away the sick feeling inside me. I knew this would happen. I mean, it’s no secret Ryker likes sex and blondes are his favorite. It’s one of the reasons I dyed my hair from my natural blond after a while. I didn’t want to be another conquest to him.

I’m good enough to play with, but when the lights are down, he’s gone. He’ll never be mine, and I need to accept that, butmy head is a fucking mess, and this new act we have to put on doesn’t help.

Something draws my gaze back inside, and whatever was left of my heart cracks inside my chest as I watch Ry head upstairs, guided by that same leggy blonde. It doesn’t take a genius to guess what they are doing, and as I turn forward, I down half the bottle and hope it numbs this pain.

It doesn’t work, though, and I want to fuck up this pretty house just to feel something, but I don’t. I stand on the balcony as silent as a statue while the man I love goes upstairs with someone else, wishing it were me the entire time.

Still, I wouldn’t change this pain for anything, because it would mean he isn’t in my life, but I don’t know how long I can go on like this.

I realize I can’t be his friend, not when I’m in love with him.

I’ll have to be, though, even if it breaks my heart.

Staring at the sky, I force myself not to go after him. Ryker is meant to shine in the spotlight. I need to remember that, even when it’s hard.

“Shit, you stole my hiding spot.” I whirl at the feminine voice and watch a grinning Reign Harrow step outside. She shuts the door and mutes the frivolity and music inside. “Mind if I hide here with you?”

I blink in shock. Reign Harrow is a fucking rock legend. If I were straight, I’d be all over her in an instant. She’s hot as hell but also engaged. Nodding silently, I watch her walk over and lean against the railing like I am. She gazes at the sky, holding a full, untouched glass in her hand. As I stare at her profile in shock, I notice she looks sad and tired.

Does anyone else see that? When she glances at me, I realize they probably don’t. She doesn’t let them, but I’m a nobody, so she doesn’t bother hiding it. “Crazy, right? The party.”

“Oh, uh, yeah.” I nod, glancing back at the sky so she doesn’t think I’m a creeper.

“I would say you get used to it but . . .” She laughs humorlessly. “I suppose you do in a way. I don’t know which is worse, that this becomes normal or the fakeness of it all.”

I nod again, unsure what to say. A nobody like me doesn’t speak to Reign Harrow.

“Sorry, ignore my rant. Anyway, what are you hiding from?” My eyes swing to hers, and she grins. “You don’t come out here unless you’re hiding.”

“What are you hiding from?” I ask.

The sad smile she gives me makes me blink. “You know, you’re the first person to ever ask me that.” She turns back to the sky, and I think she won’t answer, that I’ve overstepped, and I curse myself silently.

“My fiancé,” she admits, “and the adoring crowd and cameras that follow us around all the time. I just needed peace, you know?” She glances at me. “You get tired of it all after a while, no matter how much you wanted it.”

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