Page 94 of Under Pressure

I stroke a hand down his chest, needing to get something off my mind, though. “Do you remember what you said when you showed up here the other night?”

“Yes,” he says warily, sensing my unease.

“Did you mean it all?” My inner critic won’t let it rest, insisting it was all just drunk ramblings, the kind of things a person not in their right mind would say, despite how sincere he’d seemed.

He rolls on his side to face me, burying a hand in my hair to cup the back of my head. His eyes are piercing as he holds my gaze, rooting me in place. “Every bit of it is true.”

My heart eases, a tension I didn’t realize I was carrying lifting off my shoulders. “Ethan said you’ve been miserable.”

He snorts, a brief smile flirting over his lips. “He needs to mind his own business.” He massages the back of my neck and I preen under his attention, his fingers working their magic on the muscles there. “But I’m glad he talked to you, then chewed me out. I needed to hear it. I didn’t… I haven’t…” He blows out a breath, gathering the right words. “I don’t like being dependent on others. Or knowing they rely on me in return.” Discomfort radiates off him, but he forges on anyway. “Realizing how close we’ve become, that you had expectations of me, that I felt like I needed you too… I didn’t like it. So I sabotaged it.”

I rub a comforting hand over his arm, letting him know it’s okay to continue.

“I didn’t want to hurt you, but I had to protect myself. And there was no way to spare you in the process. You wouldn’t let me,” he says, giving a rueful smile. “I realize now that obviously wasn’t the way to go. It did nothing but cause us both misery. I—I’m so sorry, Mia.” There’s true pain in his voice, not that it cancels out what he did, but I understand how your brain can lead you to the wrong conclusions sometimes.

I nod, accepting his apology, and loop my arm around his middle, snuggling further into him. “Just promise me you won’t shut me out again.”

He moves his hand out from under my mass of hair to smooth it down, fingering the curls. “Whether you like it or not, you’re stuck with me.”

“It’s not being stuck if you look forward to it every day.”

He kisses the top of my head, the two of us content to linger in bed here together for the remainder of the day. Thank God it’s spring break, so we don’t have to worry about school or work. It’s pure bliss to be wrapped in his arms like this, knowing we’re finally on the same page, both of us committed to this relationship.

I don’t think there’s a single thing I could find fault with right now.

You still have to write your research paper. You have a test next week in Classical Mythology you haven’t studied for. And your hair probably looks like a crazy mess.

Well, some things never change.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Tyler

“I can come with you.It’s not too late,” Mia tells me, her voice echoing through the car’s speakers. Buried under the concern, the beginnings of anxiety bleed through in her tone, but I have no intention of putting her in any more stressful situations. It’s amazing how well I pick up on little nuances like that now that I’m really paying attention.

“I’ll be okay. But thanks for offering.”

I sit in the driveway of my parents’ house, my car idling, parked behind Dan’s truck. Or should I think of him as Dad now? I don’t know what’s real anymore.

“I’m here for you if you need me for anything.”

I smile to myself, secretly pleased at her caring. Having a girlfriend actually isn’t too bad. Someone to look out for me, share things with. Plus all the hot sex. If there are any drawbacks to being in a relationship, I haven’t seen them. “I love you.” The words are still so new leaving my mouth, yet completely right.

I sense her elation even before she responds. “I love you, too,” she says, her voice soft. “Let me know how it goes.”

“I will.”

We hang up and I take a moment longer to collect my thoughts before getting out of the car. I was hoping Mom would be home, but maybe it’s better to talk to Dan privately first.

After another therapy session with Dr. Friedman, I’m ready to speak to my family. I just needed her guidance on organizing it all in my head. What I should say, what I should keep to myself. It won’t help to go in there guns blazing with accusations all around. I mostly just want some answers. To clear the air.

To start fresh.

I carefully unlock the door and walk in the kitchen, finding Dan at the stove, frying ground beef.

He looks up in surprise at me, nearly dropping his spatula. “Tyler, you startled me. I didn’t even hear you come in.” That’s because I didn’t want him to. “It always surprises me that you can move so quietly for how big you are.” I’m the tallest guy in the family, topping him and my brothers by a few inches. And since I’ve taken up boxing, I’m the strongest out of any of them too. “Your mother took Riley to her Girl Scouts meeting. She won’t be home for a while,” he says nervously when I simply stand there, silent.

I clear my throat, knowing it’s uncharacteristic of me to choose to be alone with him. “I was actually hoping to talk to you.”

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