Page 81 of Under Pressure

“He realized he’s actually in a relationship.”

My intense interest abruptly fades.

What did you think he was going to say? Tyler realized he’s in love with you or something? Get real.

Damn it, you’re supposed to be gone.

“No,” I tell him, pulling the straps of my backpack tighter. “We’re definitely not. We’re not anything. At his insistence,” I tack on, giving him a rueful smile.

His own smile lessens. “Well, he’s miserable.”

I shrug, hoping I appear more nonchalant than I feel. “I can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.”

He strokes a hand over his jaw. “God, doesn’t that describe him,” he murmurs.

“I thought I was getting through at one point, but then it was like I was beating my head against a brick wall.”

“So you’re done with him?”

“I—” That’s what I told him, wasn’t it? But that was in the heat of the moment. The truth is, I don’t know. I still care about him, still miss him. But I’m not going to waste my time on him when he’s made it clear he’s not interested in anything more. I have some pride. “He doesn’t want a relationship. He must have realized that’s where we were headed. So he broke it off.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

I laugh, the sound slightly hysterical even to my own ears. “It doesn’t matter what I want.”

He frowns, opening his mouth to say something else but I cut him off. “I have to go, I have another exam.” My stomach clenches at the lie, but I need to get out of here. It’s not doing any good for my mental well-being standing here talking about Tyler if I don’t have to.

“Okay, see you,” he says and I nearly laugh again. There’s no reason we’d see each other again, unless we happened to run across one another on campus like this. I won’t be going back to Tyler’s house or the gym. That part of my life is… over.

I walk away quickly before the tears threatening my eyes escape, toward the direction of the lot I’m parked in, berating myself on the drive home for caring this much. We were never even dating. So why does it feel so awful?

I spot Muffin’s mom at the mail center at our apartment complex and quickly decide to pick up my mail another day. I don’t need her asking about Tyler too.

I walk through my front door, the decadent smell of vanilla hitting my nose as soon as I cross the threshold. I glance around, the place spotless. Carpet vacuumed, dishes washed, living room neat and tidy. What the hell happened in here? Did I clean in my sleep or something and not remember it?

Kelsey’s bedroom door opens, a pleased grin on her face. “Do you like it?” She spreads her arms wide and twirls, showcasing the apartment. “I cleaned.”

I set my backpack down on the dining room table. Wow, I can actually see the surface. “It looks amazing.”

“I did everything you asked me to do. I even got a candle to make it all nice and homey.” She grabs my hand and leads me over to the coffee table, where she leans over and takes a big whiff of a French vanilla-scented candle.

I take a seat on the couch, gazing in wonder around me. She sits down on the other side, appearing more serious now. “I’ve thought a lot about what you said. You’ve been a crutch for me and I’ve been relying on you too long.” She twists her fingers together in front of her, clearly nervous. I’ve never been so firm with her as I was the other week, though. “I was complaining to Mom and she reminded me how much you’ve always done for me. I haven’t been holding up my end of the roommate responsibilities and I’m sorry.”

I grab one of her hands, squeezing lightly. “Apology accepted.”

“I promise I’ll keep up with the chores. You’re my oldest friend and I know we’re not as close as we used to be, but I still care about you. I don’t want to lose you over something so stupid as not doing the dishes.”

I nod, leaning forward to pull her into a hug, her hair tickling my nose.

“I’m going out tonight,” she says excitedly. “Element is running a special ladies’ night. Drinks are free for us. Wanna come?” And be her designated driver? No, thanks. I swear, since she turned twenty-one, she’s become a real lush.

“I think I’ll stay in.”

“But it’s officially spring break now! It’s time to get crazy.”

“Get crazy for the both of us.” I pat her hand and get up, heading into the kitchen to see what I can make for dinner.

“Okay, well, if you change your mind, just call me.”

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