Page 33 of Sort of Seeing Someone

Fika: The Art of The Swedish Coffee Break.

I love coffee, but I don’t remember Angeline mentioning that it had anything to do with learning more about my gift. Plus, what do the Swedes have to do with anything?

I reach for the next book, the one I’m expecting to be about crystals, and set it down on the table.

Reverse Osmosis: A Guide for the Engineering Professional - 1st Edition

The third book isThe Phantom of the Opera.

Woo-woo starter kit? Talk about…A Beginner’s Guide to Nerd Life. I drop my head into my hand as I realize the unthinkable has happened. My bag did indeed get swapped with the one belonging to the guy I ran into when I left The Energy Shoppe. Whoever he was, he’s now carrying my bag of tricks and I have his. Oh, why couldn’t this have turned out to be a liquor store goodie bag after all? I could really use a swig of whiskey right about now.

Convinced that‘fika’might be the Scandinavian translation for‘FML’, I try to focus on the positive. Tin Lizzie’s is an open-air bar just down the street. This truly couldn’t be any more convenient and despite it being mildly creepy, I’m relieved at how easy it is to find someone on the internet these days—especially in this situation. So, I grab my bag—I mean,hisbag—and head down the block looking to make ‘the switch’ as quick and painless as possible.

Without even having to go into the establishment, I can see the guy is sitting by himself outside, sipping a beer, watching a big screen. He takes the navy blue hat off, sets it on the table, and rubs his hands through his blonde hair with a nostalgic level of teenage angst.

“That’s not a foul! Come on, Ref. Are you fucking blind?!”

“Sorry to interrupt,” I semi-shout from the other side of the planter box. “But I think this is your bag.”

“Oh good. You got my message.”

When he’s not screaming at the TV, I notice he has a bit of an accent—although I can’t quite place it.

“Here you go,” I say as we complete the hand-off.

“Did you look through my bag?” he asks, just as I am about to walk away.

“Did you look throughmine?” I nervously hit back.

“Yes. It was quite an entertaining grab-bag to wind up in the hands of someone like me. Do people really need this stuff to feel better about the way the world works? I’m all about reading a goodhow-tobook, don’t get me wrong, but marketing these as ‘self-help’ is everything that’s wrong with America.”

I try not to take offense to the fact he clearly doesn’t subscribe to anything supernatural. I barely do, but at least he could humor me—a perfect stranger who was kind enough to hightail it to Tin Lizzie’s and sort out this snafu.

“Well, Reverse Osmosis isn’t exactly my jam either,” I say back. “AndThe Phantom of the Opera is boring, so…there’s that.”

He flashes a cocky smirk and takes off his sunglasses.

“Whatever you need to tell yourself.”

The sass, coupled with the accent, and I recognize the playground bully immediately.

“You,” I say. “It’syou.”

“Oh god, here we go. Look, I’m terrible with faces. But if you are the girl from Bumble I never responded to, I’m sorry. I justreallydon’t like cats.”

“No, I’m the girl from the yoga studio.”

“Oh. Well you’ve definitelygot the wrong guy then. I don’t do yoga,” he says, relieved likeMauryPovichhas just told him he isnotthe father.

“You seriously don’t remember me?”

“I said I’m bad with faces,” he doubles down.

“San Diego. Ocean Beach. Ceiling falling. You were the guy who ratted us out to the City Inspector.”

He takes his sweet time putting his sunglasses back on before saying even more slowly: “And you’re the girl who thought it could be fixed with a jar ofspackle.”

“What are the odds,” I say with a hint of my own smugness.

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