Page 70 of Sort of Seeing Someone

“Take it from me. It doesn’t matter what youreallyare. It’s all about what people on the internet think of you. Check out the traffic at your table now,” she says.

I turn around and see a line of people waiting to for me to wrap up with Shereé and check them out.

“Wow,” I say in actual disbelief.

“And that’s all because of the caption I threw on our selfie just now.”

Shereé hands me her phone. The text accompanying the photo of the two of us says: “From Rags to WITCHES! As seen with Chicago’s Favorite Witch, @MoonieMiller.”

I hand it back to her, slightly horrified that she’s charged ahead with a persona I didn’t approve. Behind me, hordes of people—cash in hand—keep lining up.

“I’ll leave you to it, Witchy Woman,” Shereé says.

God, she’s good.

“One bottle of Love Potion, please,” Ollie says, making his way back to my booth at the end of the show.

I know he’s joking, but feels good to tell him the truth.

“No can do,” I say, sorting a bunch of cash behind my desk. “I’m totally sold out.”

“In hotel speak, that’s calleda perfect sell,” he says.

“And I have a waiting list thirty people deep. What’sthatcalled in hotel speak?” I ask.

“That would be known as anoverflow—meaning there are no rooms left and we have to literally walk guests over to competing hotels for a free stay. No good.”

Thankfully I can’t think of anyone else in Chicago doing what I do, so there’s nowhere else for anyone to ‘walk’ to. Or maybe, people like meareout there. They’re just not willing to say that they’re “a witch” in their Instagram profile in order to attract more followers.

Yes, that means that I did it. In a quiet moment when the line finally died down, I pulled up my Instagram profile and edited my bio text like Shereé suggested.

The only thing I want to call myself less than ‘a witch’ is ‘a sellout’. But this is not that, I assure myself. This is, as Ollie would say, Marketing 101—a lesson in branding. I know I’m not a witch, but explaining what I am will take more characters than an Instagram bio will allow. I need to be understood, easily and quickly. Plus, there are other five-letter words out there that are far worse to be called and for what it’s worth…it’s kind of catchy. Maybe I can do amerch line with the slogan?We’ll see.

“Hopefully it won’t take me long to whip up all these extra orders,” I say. “I’ve promised them all before the holidays.”

“Many hands make for light work, my dad would always say at the hotel.”

“I’m a one woman show,” I remind him.

“I aced chemistry, you know. I can help mix up some potions.”

“Youwant to mixLove Potion?” I say as I proceed to break down my desk. It’s time to officially close up shop.

“I’m good with my hands and I like to try new things.”

My face is turned away from him when he says that, which is the perfect time to bite my lip, close my eyes, andpray to godthat vision of us in a bed comes true so I can find out just how much truth there is behind those accidentally-kinky words.

“By the way,” he says. “I have to confess I didn’t stick around this market the whole time, and frankly, I didn’t plan on coming back to see you now. But there was something really bothering me about your little table set up here so I had to make a run to the hardware store while you were busy slinging potion.”

Ollie pulls out up a plastic bag and a power drill from a backpack I didn’t notice him wearing. I say nothing as I wait for an explanation.

“These are called caster wheels,” he says. “And they’re about to rock your world.”

“Tell me more, Tim-the-Tool-Man Taylor.”

I immediately realize my throwbackHome Improvementreference will be lost on the Swede.

“Sure, it’s great that your desk folds flat for fitting into the back of car. But how will you move it there?”

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