Page 77 of Crossing Lines

Zeki nods and heads back inside.

“Will you come inside with me?” Evren asks, helping me stand up from my bent-over position. “I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

“I…can’t do this.” I step away from him and toward the elevator.

“What do you mean? You’ve spent weeks preparing for this; you can’t walk away now.”

“I can and I will.”

“Why? Please, help me understand.”

“Not now.” I stare at the wall, refusing to open up about it, not here, not now. “I…can’t talk about it now. I’m sorry,” I whisper, still refusing to look at him, refusing to see the disappointment on his face. With my gaze on the ground, I walk steadily to the elevators.

“Don’t do this,” he says, his voice rough with desperation. “Don’t sabotage your dreams.”

I hold in another building sob and give him a blank look over my shoulder, refusing to break right now. “You’ll be fine. You have everything you need to get Glam Pop to accept.”

“This isn’t about Glam Pop, and you know it.”

“I know,” I say, pressing the down button on the wall. It’s difficult to ignore the guilt encircling my entire body, trapping me in a prison of my own making. “But Mick’s my fath—” I choke back a sob, my hand covering my mouth. With my eyes, I plead with him to understand.

“He’s your father?” Evren asks.

I nod and Evren frowns. He glances at the conference room and then back at me. “Did you know that he was part of Glam Pop?”

I shake my head and get into the elevator.

“But it’s too much of a coincidence,” he says, his face carefully blank as the doors begin sliding shut. “What if?—”

I’m relieved that whatever he was going to say gets cut off by the elevator. When Evren’s done with the meeting, he’s going to demand an explanation, or accuse me of trying to betray him.

Oh God, he must think I’m just like Mert. I order a ride home, barely holding myself together, and call Elodie.

“Hey,” she says. “Is it over? So soon? How?—”

“I need you,” I choke out. “I… We need to go to Berlin right now.”

There’s a pause before she says, “Are you home?”

“Heading there in an Uber.”

“Okay, I’ll be there when you arrive, and we can talk about whatever is going on and?—”

“No,” I shout. “I need to leave. I can’t… Oh God, he’s going to be so angry with me.” Evren’s going to fire me when he gets home. He’s been hurt by too many people to listen, to believe me.

“All right,” Elodie says slowly. “I’ll come over and help you pack and then we can leave. Whatever is going on will be okay. I’ve got you.”

I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from falling apart in the Uber and nod, even if Elodie can’t see me. “Can you distract me? Please?”

“Um, okay? Let me think. Okay, maybe TMI but I got my IUD taken out because my period was getting too heavy and too uncomfortable to manage. I really thought going copper was the right choice, but joke’s on me. You’re lucky you chose the hormonal one….”

I’d laugh if I wasn’t so close to having a nervous breakdown. Elodie and her random TMIs are the only things holding me together right now.

When I get home, I scribble a note to Evren explaining that I’m leaving for Berlin and that I’m sorry for everything. My tears drip onto the paper as I fold it closed and place it on the dining table. I just hope he’ll forgive me, that we’re not over before we’ve even begun.

Chapter 20

Evren

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