I text my brother back first.

Me:I’ll go if you go

I don’t expect Sebastian to get back to me right away because I know he’s got meetings with his manager about what the off season looks like. Something about a team building trip with the guys and a new workout regimen to keep him in shape on top of a few different commercials he’s supposed to film before the season starts again in the fall. It’s weird knowing that the boy who used to pick his nose and try wiping it on me is in nationwide commercials now.

I thumb out a quick reply to the woman who I get my ashy hair and soft, minty eyes from.

Me:You’d miss me too much if I didn’t

She would too. My mother and I have always been best friends. We’d get into small fights once in a while, but it was more like siblings bickering than anything substantial. I love her more than anything, and if I’m being honest, I’d misshertoo much if I chose to stay in New York instead of going home to Vermont for part of the summer.

It’s why most of the post-grad internships I’m applying to are close to home. She told me to expand my search instead of limiting myself, but I know she isn’t a fan of being an empty nester.

I’m surprised when my phone pings, thinking it’s already Sebastian getting back to me when I see an unknown number on my screen.

Unknown:I got a new number

Brows pinching, I try figuring out what area code it is. Sebastian sometimes has to change his numbers if the wrong people get hold of it. Like one-night stands that want to be more than that or the random media outlets who somehow get it for inside scoops. He’s had to give me at least two different numbers for that exact reason since joining the Rangers.

Me:This must be a record for you, Seb. Three new numbers in one year. Which girl got your number this time?

Smirking at my reply, I watch as bubbles appear at the bottom of the screen.

Then my smile slips when I see the next message pop up.

Unknown:Not your brother

I blink, suddenly very confused. Before I can guess another name, like Hoffman even though I’m fairly certain I’ve never had Bodhi’s number before, I get a follow-up text.

Unknown:It’s Alex

Swallowing my heart that jumps into my throat, I stare at the message. I have to wipe my clammy palms on my jeans as my eyes swipe over the two words.

BecauseAlex? I’ve known a lot of people named Alex in my short twenty-one years, but only one of them ever had my number. It’s been a long time since he used it.

As if he can read my mind from wherever he is right now, I get another message from the unfamiliar number.

Unknown:I know it’s been a long time

I scoff. A long time? It’s been months. More than a half a year. Hell, I’m pretty sure the last exchange we had was overninemonths ago. The only thing he’d said was ‘hi’ and ‘how are you’ like I was supposed to be excited that he reached out at all.

My fingers hover over the keyboard of my phone, halting above the letters as I think about what to say. But whatisthere to say that hasn’t been said already? Wouldn’t I just be reentering the vicious cycle that comes with loving Alexander O’Conner?

By the time Skylar shows back up, I think I’m sweating with indecision and irritation.

“Whoa,” she remarks, sitting down with a frown on her face. “Are you okay? Did you eat the surprise casserole at the dining hall again? You look like you did when you were glued to the toilet that one time.”

She’d know because I had to call her to bring me toilet paper. Thank God we’re friends, because she saw, and smelled, way more than she signed up for that day.

“No,” I force myself to say, turning my screen off without replying to Alex.

He doesn’t deserve a response.

It was never going to be love. Not with you.

Those words still have a chokehold on my heart since they fell out of those stupid full lips of his. Screw him. Seriously.

“My parents are arguing about my summer plans,” I explain, hoping my voice sounds undisturbed.