Page 91 of Revealing Mark
“Where were you?” I repeated my question, determined to get an answer.
He studied me for a few moments in silence.
“My grandfather died.”
His news hit me square in the chest and winded me. Then I understood the tiredness in his features and his red-rimmed eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, unsure of how to proceed.
“I knew it was coming…” Like it was supposed to make it easier but I doubted it did.
“Why didn’t you call?” It didn’t explain why he hadn’t answered his calls or called back. Why hadn’t he called to tell me about his grandfather?
Was this again his inability to open up and share things? I stopped myself from allowing my thoughts to run down a path of their own.
“When I got the call about my grandfather, I lost it.” He sighed. It was so unlike the controlled person I was used to. “I threw my phone against the wall. With everything going on, I lost track of time.”
Was that why he hadn’t received any of the messages or voicemails? It was all starting to make sense.
“How did you find out, then?” I asked.
“Matthew had left a message with the doorman at my building to call him urgently. When I rang him, he told me everything and I came straight over. When you didn’t answer the door, I let myself in.” He stepped closer and this time I didn’t. “God, Tracy, I’m so sorry I wasn’t there. When I think of what you went through, I find it hard to breathe. I should have been there.”
My features softened when I reached for his hand and took it in mine. “You can’t be in two places. You were exactly where you were supposed to be.”
He swallowed hard and I put my arms around him. I could feel his pain and there was nothing I could do to take it away, all I could do was show him that I was there for him.
We stood for a few minutes in silence. I couldn’t be relieved that his grandfather had died but I knew if it hadn’t been as serious, I doubt I would have been able to forgive as easily. The heaviness in my chest eased and I listened to the steady beat of his heart.
I sighed.
“You okay?” he asked. I lifted my eyes to meet his.
I nodded.
“Can I see?” he asked, looking at the bandage.
I let him peel the bandage back and I watched his expression. It made my heart swell. His fingers set the bandage back into place and I winced slightly.
“How are your ribs?” he asked.
I unbuttoned my shirt and opened it. His hands touched the bruising and lightly traced the discolored skin from one end to the other. I shivered from his touch.
“I have to take it easy for a few days.” The worst was having to move around slowly so I didn’t jar my injury by mistake.
“Matthew said the guy’s brakes locked and he hit you from behind,” he murmured, looking like he was wrestling between anger and something else.
I nodded. “I didn’t see it coming.” I couldn’t even remember the other car or any other victims. All that had mattered was my own pain and waiting anxiously for my brother to get there.
I had been ill prepared, which had made it so much worse, but even if I had seen it about to unfold it wouldn’t have made much of a difference.
“I’m supposed to be there to protect you.” It was like he had somehow failed me.
“You can’t be with me all the time. It was an accident. I’m okay.” I felt the need to reassure him. There was no reason for him to feel guilt. He had done nothing wrong. He wasn’t superhuman, he could only do what was humanly possible.
“It could have been worse,” he whispered hoarsely. I felt his fear, it felt similar to how I felt when I had assessed my injuries right after the accident.
I was lucky, and we had each other. I couldn’t ask for anything more.
