Page 73 of Revealing Mark
She led me from the living room, down the passage to a room I had never been in.
“I come here when I need to feel like he is still here,” she explained when she opened the door.
It was a huge room filled with art. On an easel was an incomplete painting.
My eyes filled with wonder as I took in each masterpiece. There must have been at least twelve. I walked up to the one painting and nearly touched it.
“Who painted these?”
“Your father. He was very talented but he didn’t feel comfortable showing people. This was his private collection.”
This is what I had been looking for. Something clicked into place. I had gotten some of my creativity from him, it was something that tied me more than just the blood that ran through my veins.
“They are beautiful.”
I wandered quietly in awe from one picture to the other. I breathed in every stroke, every color, and I felt a sense of peace.
Most of them were of landscapes but there were a few of a girl. When I studied them, I realized they were of me.
“He…?” I was speechless.
“Yes. He loved painting you. There are a few of the boys but he found capturing you on canvas far more challenging than any other project.”
I teared up when I stopped in front of one where I was facing to the side. I had such a faraway look in my eyes.
“I think it helped him feel closer to you.”
This was more personal than a few photos kept in an album. This was how he saw me, like a beautiful woman with the world at her feet, that’s how the picture portrayed me with a determined slight to my chin and flash of defiance in my eyes. My hair was billowing in the air like I was riding free.
I had never looked at myself like that. It was difficult not tobe emotionally moved by what I was seeing. A tear slid down and I wiped it.
“I’m sorry,” Maggie whispered beside me, sounding as affected as I was. She put an arm around me. “I was selfish not to show these sooner. It’s just, I haven’t been ready to part with them yet.”
I shook my head. “These are yours.”
“No. I’ve a lifetime of memories to keep. He would want you to have them. These are yours now.”
I looked at her and her image blurred. “Thank you.”
It was the greatest gift anyone could give me and I was so grateful for her understanding.
We stood side by side for a while while I struggled with my emotions. “I grew up never feeling like I really belonged.” I felt her shift to look at me, but I felt like I would lose my nerve if I faced her. “When I discovered Robert was my real father, I searched for something that would help me connect with him and until now there hadn’t been anything.” I let out a breath. “But I feel it now.”
She squeezed me and I leaned my head on her shoulder. She was a good woman. How Robert could have cheated on her I would never know, but I understood why it had been important for him to keep her.
It was late when I left Maggie’s. I found myself too worked up to go home so I drove around for a while.
I thought about Mark and his visit to my apartment earlier. Somehow I discovered I was pulling up in front of his apartment building. I wasn’t sure exactly what I was doing there but I felt like I had to see him. I checked my watch, it was well after eleven. I debated whether this was a good idea or not. Throwing caution to the wind, I followed my instinct and entered his building.
There was no surprising him this time. When the doorman called him to tell him I was here, he told him to send me up.
I was nervous as I took the elevator up to the top floor.
He was standing in the open doorway as the elevator doors opened.
I stepped out and the doors closed behind me.
He still had the ability to blow me away and I found myself short of breath. My anger couldn’t diminish his effect on me or how I felt about him. His dark eyelashes brought out the severity of the green in his eyes and I felt hypnotized. I had crushed on the boy who had stolen my heart, but now I loved him in a way a woman loved a man. It was who he was, what he stood for, and I knew if anything happened he was the one I wanted on my side to stand beside me.
