"Trust me, you don't want me anywhere near a kitchen," he assured me. "I set the kitchen on fire twice at home."
"Okay, then it's time for pizza," I responded.
I called for takeout. It was the second time I found myself missing Matthew. If he were here he would be hard at work in the kitchen, cooking up a storm.
"How areyourskills in the kitchen?" he asked.
"I can boil an egg," I replied, and he grinned.
"At least we won't starve."
After we ate our pizza that arrived half an hour later, I said goodnight to Levi and went to bed.
But instead of sleeping, I lay awake, studying my ceiling as I thought about Slater and the girl he'd mentioned in his sleep. Could Shannon really be his sister?
I turned on my side and hugged my pillow. I had the urge to call Connor and ask him to find out what happened to the sister Slater had never mentioned he had. My intuition and his reaction when I mentioned the name Shannon told me she was the reason he was so emotionally scarred.
Does it matter?I asked myself. It shouldn't. For my own preservation I had to make myself forget about him.
Slater's face was above mine. My body intertwined with his. The sight of the sadness in his eyes tugged at my heart. I reached out and touched his cheek with my hand, wanting to be able to take some of the sadness from the depths of his eyes.
"What happened?" I asked, searching his eyes for the answers.
He pulled away and rolled off me. I sat up, holding the sheet to my chest. I wanted to push him for answers but I knew if I pushed him too far he would walk away.
"I can't," he whispered. The hoarseness in his voice made me reach out and touch his back.
"You have to tell someone," I urged him.
His back stiffened slightly before he looked back over his shoulder. His face was somber as he faced me.
"Tell me what happened?" he asked, turning the tables on me.
I retracted my hand like he'd burned my fingertips and gripped the sheet tighter to my chest. The swirl of emotions suffocated me from inside. Betrayal, anger, and humiliation constricted my lungs as his eyes held mine.
"You have to tell someone," he said. I shook my head, refusing to even consider the option.
I had never told anyone what had happened to me and I wasn't going to talk now. Revealing it would not ease the burden I carried. It wouldn't erase what happened to me.
I woke up feeling distressed and uneasy. The point of my dream wasn't lost on me. If I wanted him to open up about his issues, I had to be prepared to do the same. And I wasn't.
"You feellike going out tonight?" I asked Levi the next day.
It would be easier to face Slater if I had someone I could use as a buffer.
"Where?" he asked while he watched sports on TV.
"I'm going out with a couple of friends—Sin and Taylor." There was a good chance Slater would be there as well. "Sin mentioned some college party."
"Sure," he said. I felt relieved. My medication was still keeping my emotions from making me unable to cope with day-to-day tasks, but I feared it wouldn't be enough to help me through tonight.
I could have canceled, and I had toyed with the idea, but the fact that Taylor wanted to go out was something I had to support. It hadn't been an easy road to recovery for her but with every little step she was getting better.
It helped that the crazy who had been responsible for her ordeal was locked up.
"What time do you need me to be ready?" he asked as he focused back on the TV in front of him.
"About eight," I said. "We'll go to their place first."