Page 37 of Loving Bad
That night, I couldn't sleep. I kept picturing Sin's expression when he saw me with my brother. I wanted to pretend nothing had happened and our arrangement was still intact.
The next day, I went about my day feeling tired. I kept looking at my phone wishing it would ring and I had to stop myself a few times from dialing his number again.
"What were you doing last night when you should have been sleeping?" asked Caleb in a teasing tone after our class. I suppressed a yawn as I walked beside him.
"I wish it had been that exciting. Truth is I just couldn't sleep," I admitted with a shrug. There was no way I was going to tell him the truth.
Friday night, Jordan told me we'd both been invited to another party at Slater's house. I had no idea how they could afford to throw a party nearly every single weekend. I wrestled with the fact that I still hadn't heard anything from Sin and I wasn't sure going to a party at his house was such a good idea.
"Come on, you have to go," she tried to persuade me.
If I went to the party and Sin was still trying to avoid me, it would be awkward and weird.
"I can't," I replied, keeping to my decision not to run after Sin. I was sitting on my bed with a book open trying to get some studying in. The truth was I'd been looking at the same page for thirty minutes, but I hadn't been able to concentrate on it. Jordan looked disappointed.
"Did something happen between you and Sin?" she asked. It didn't take a rocket scientist to see I'd been preoccupied for the last couple of days.
"I'm not sure," I replied honestly with a shrug.
"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.
"Not really," I answered. I didn't know if there was something wrong. It might have been just in my head.
"How are you getting to the party?" I asked as I watched Jordan put the last touches on her makeup.
"When I texted Slater to tell him you wouldn't be coming, he insisted on coming to pick me up," she revealed.
I was relieved that I didn't have to worry about how she was going to get to the party. It wasn't safe to walk alone.
Then I thought about the underwear on my bed. I wasn't even safe in my own room. Most people would probably be too scared to be on their own in a room that had been invaded by a stranger, but I'd experienced far worse than that and it took a lot to scare me. Besides, there were other girls in the dorm so I wasn't exactly alone.
I was determined not to allow it to impede on my life. Twenty minutes later, Jordan said goodbye and hurried downstairs, leaving me on my own. I was dressed in a pair of old tracksuit pants and an oversized shirt that I'd swiped from my brother. It was old and even though it had a couple of holes in it I loved it. It was comfortable.
After another ten minutes of trying to study and getting nowhere, I closed my book. There was no point in trying to study because no matter how hard I tried I couldn't concentrate. I took out my e-reader and began to look for something to read. I loved romance books. I settled on one I'd read countless times before.
I'd just gotten a few pages in when I heard a soft knock against my door. I put my e-reader down beside my bed and went to answer the door. I hadn't been expecting anyone. A nervous feeling settled over me as I walked over to the door. If it were the same person who had broken into my room before, would they knock? I shook my head as I realized how ridiculous I was being.
I opened the door. Sin was standing there with his hands shoved into the front pockets of his jeans. He was dressed in his usual look, faded jeans and a plain shirt. I felt the flutter in my stomach at the sight of him. I hadn't expected to see him. The fact that he hadn't contacted me had spoken volumes. But him coming here put that whole theory up in the air.
"I could have been a rapist or a murderer and you just opened the door without asking who it is," he lectured me with a crease in his forehead.
"If it's my time to go it's my time to go," I replied. He studied me for a moment.
"That is a strange outlook to have," he said.
I shrugged. I wasn't going to explain why I had that outlook. We were exclusively having sex, we weren't seeing each other or dating. For a few awkward moments we stood silently.
"Aren't you going to invite me in?" he asked.
"Are you going to rape or murder me?" I asked in a teasing tone.
"Not tonight," was his comeback. I stepped aside so he could enter and closed the door behind him. Suddenly I felt self-conscious in my comfy clothes. He looked around the room and turned to face me.
"Why are you here?" I asked as I tucked a stray stand of hair behind my ear. His eyes held mine for a moment as I bit down on my bottom lip.
