Page 174 of The Puck Stops Here

‘We all have secrets, Blake.’

‘Hers ain’t pretty.’

Though everything she’d done, she’d done for her friends. For love and for loyalty. And she’d owned her mistakes. Much like she’d helped him to own his. Own them and move on.

‘Neither are ours, but the way she handles our story, the way she handles Dad even… She’s a good person and she’s good for you. I think you know that deep down and it scares the life out of you. You’re running the other way because accepting her love will force you to accept your own feelings for her in return.’

Was his brother right? Was he so determined to paint her in a bad light to protect himself from what he already knew?

‘Read the article, Blake. Read that and tell me she doesn’t mean every word she says.’

‘She’s a journalist, this is what she does.’

‘Just read it.’

* * *

Astrid had lost track of the days. She’d allowed herself a day of wallowing in Massachusetts and then flown home and thrown herself into work. Sissi had messaged for an update, and she’d played it vague, skipping over the emergency trip to the pharmacy and playing down the emotional fallout.

There was so much going on in the world of her friends that she didn’t want to offload her mess on them too and she knew that was her all over. Never showing people the worst of her for fear of losing them, but it wasn’t so much a fear of losing them as it was feeling guilty for the part she had played in everyone else’s problems.

Bella for Chase.

Sienna for Aiden.

Blake for her betrayal.

And Paige for not sharing her own epic blunders and making her friend feel a little better about her own. But she couldn’t tell Paige without Bella, and she wasn’t burdening Bella when Bella already had enough going on with Chase. It was an impossible circle she hoped to break come Friday when all her karma girls would be in the same room again, attending the pre-opening party for Chase’s gallery and showing their support to Bella.

She had her disguise picked out already to avoid catching Chase’s eye and she’d hopefully find the right moment to confess all face to face. Then she could move on from this whole damn mess.

Her heart though, she had a feeling that was going to take so much longer to heal…

As for the hurt she’d inflicted on Blake… she could only hope her article would go some way to helping him heal.

She’d sent it twenty-four hours ago and heard nothing. Not that she’d expected an instant response, but maybe just an acknowledgement of receipt. From Aiden at least.

She refreshed her email again, triple checking she’d sent it. Triple checking the contact details too. Refresh.

No email.

She couldn’t relax until she knew. Couldn’t move on to her next job either. Her life felt like it was stuck in some post-Blake limbo. Is this what Sissi had felt like after Aiden had left?

Lost. Disheartened. Alone.

Christ, she was used to being alone. But it had never felt as vacuous as this. As depressing.

She looked outside at the sleet and shivered. It was definitely time to get out of New York. She’d do the gallery visit and then she’d fly home.

Not that the weather would be much better in the UK… but Blake wouldn’t be around the corner and that had to be better than this – hoping and praying he’d come knocking. He’d made his feelings clear almost a week ago and every day without him since only hammered that message home.

Her phone buzzed in her hand, a bubble with Mum appearing for a video call. She shook off the melancholy and forced a smile.

‘Hey Mum.’ Tears pricked as her mum’s familiar face filled the screen, her eyes so like Astrid’s, sparkling with warmth as she smoothed her dark hair out of her face and peered closer at the screen.

‘Oh my gosh, darling, what’s wrong?’

So much for shaking off the melancholy.

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