Page 25 of Now and Forever

We have a good time the rest of the day. I always have fun with Frida, and this time I feel Eric is constantly trying to get my attention. He needs me to kiss him and touch him as much or more than I do, but I control myself.

In the evening, we go back home. When it’s time to go to bed, I do everything in my power to keep my heart in check and give him a tempting kiss on the mouth before turning to go to my room. Eric takes my hand.

“How long is this going to go on?”

I want to say it’s over.

I want to say I can’t take it anymore.

But my pride keeps me from giving in. I wink at him, let go of his hand, and go to my room without responding.

Once I’m in my room, my most basic instincts scream at me to open the door and stop this foolish punishment I alone have imposed, but my honor won’t let me. Just like the night before, I hear him come up to the door. I know he wants to come in, but, in the end, he walks away.

In the morning, Eric’s mom calls and urgently asks him to come back to Germany. His nephew’s nanny has quit without warning to go live with her family in Vienna. He talks to the woman and argues with her. He doesn’t understand why she’s quitting without notice so they might have time to find someone else. Later, he talks to Marta, his sister, and gets agitated. When he calls his mother again, they have an argument. I hear him talk to Flyn, his nephew, and feel his helplessness. In the afternoon, he’s exhausted and overwhelmed, so I offer to go to Germany with him.

He has to take care of this problem. When I tell him, he touches his forehead to mine and hugs me.

I talk to my father and agree to come home in time to have New Year’s Eve dinner with them. Later that evening, we take Eric’s private jet from Jerez all the way to Franz Josef Strauss International in Munich.

8

There’s been a big snowstorm in Germany, and it’s fucking cold. A long, dark car is waiting for us. Eric greets the chauffeur and introduces him to me. His name is Norbert.

I look out on the empty snow-covered streets as Eric talks on the phone with his mother and promises we’ll go by the house tomorrow. There’s no one playing in the snow or strolling hand in hand. Half an hour later, the car stops in front of a steel-colored gate. When the gate opens, I see a small house next to it. Eric tells me this is where the couple who works for him lives. The car continues through a pretty, frozen garden. I blink when I see the gorgeous, enormous house that appears at the end of the drive. When the car stops, Eric helps me out.

“Welcome home,” he says as I look around.

His voice, his expression, and the way he’s looking at me give me goose bumps. He takes my hand and pulls me along. I follow him to the door where a woman in her fifties waits for us.

“Judith, this is Simona. She and her husband take care of the house.”

We come into the vestibule, and I see the man who picked us up at the airport.

“Norbert is her husband,” says Eric.

I startle them with a couple of kisses on their cheeks.

“I’m delighted to meet you,” I tell them in my perfect German.

The couple, dazed by my effusiveness, quickly glance at each other. “We are too, miss.”

“Simona, Norbert, please go rest. It’s late,” says a smiling Eric.

“We’ll take your bags up to your room first, sir,” says Norbert.

Once they’ve disappeared with our bags, Eric gives me a teasing look.

“We’re not so kissy kissy in Germany, and you rattled them,” he whispers.

“Oh! I’m sorry.”

He softly touches my face.

“It’s totally fine, Jude. I’m sure they’re going to like your way of being as much as I do.”

I nod and take a step back, or I won’t be able to control my reactions.

I look around and see the double stairway the couple went up.

---