Page 53 of Tell Me What You Want

His hand is pressing on my sex.

I can’t help but moan.

With his other hand, he puts one of mine on his hard-on. I touch him through his pants, and my whole being melts. He’s hard. Incredibly hard. He kisses me. He sucks my lips.

“I’m going to turn the stool to show those men,” he says, pulling back just inches from my face. “Don’t close your legs, and don’t pull down your dress.”

I’m on fire. And when I’m sitting with my legs splayed in front of them, a wild explosion goes off in me and my breathing turns rapid.

Three men are watching me. They’re eating me alive with their eyes. Their gaze goes from my thighs to my sex, and I can see their arousal. They want to possess me; in a way, they’re doing so with their eyes. They long to touch me. Suddenly, against all expectation, I feel explosive and perverse, and my nipples get hard as rocks as my legs open and I show them my private parts.

Standing behind me, Eric presses his cheek to mine, and I can tell he’s smiling.

He caresses my thighs with his hands and exposes me even more. He slides a finger down my slit, lets it dip inside me, then takes it out and brings it to my mouth. I suck on it, and like in a porn movie, I smack my lips as I watch the raunchy looks on the men’s faces. Just then, Eric spins the stool so that we’re face to face again.

“Do you like how you feel when you’re being watched?”

I nod.

“Would you like it if I and one, or several, of those guys got us a private room where we could undress you?” My pulse jolts and Eric goes on. “I’d open your legs and offer you to them. They’d suck and touch you while I held you and ...”

My sex tightens and I nod again.

I close my eyes. I’m practically coming just from hearing him talk. I want to do everything he’s describing. He kisses me as I feel the gaze of those three men on my back. Eric loves that. He introduces one finger into my vagina. Then two, and then he begins moving them. I open my legs even more, knowing they’re watching. I want more. I’m in flames, and just as I’m about to come, Eric stops.

“My punishment for your behavior is that we will do nothing that’s been proposed tonight. No one will touch you. We’re going back to the hotel right now. And I won’t fuck you when we get there. Tomorrow, if you’re good, I’ll consider canceling the punishment.”

Stunned, I can barely stop panting, even as my indignation grows.

Why is he doing this to me?

Eric pulls down my dress, picks up one of the little linen napkins on the bar, and washes and dries his hands. The Iceman has returned. He suggests I stand up from the stool, then pulls me outside.

The limo arrives immediately, and we climb in. We don’t say a word during the entire ride back to the hotel. Eric doesn’t look at me. He just stares out the window, his jaw tight. Hot and angry over his actions, I don’t know what to think. I don’t know what to say. I was at the point of doing something I’ve never even thought about before in my life, and now I feel betrayed because I didn’t get to do it.

When we get to the hotel, Eric accompanies me to my suite. I want to ask him in. I want him to do what he’s been promising all night. I need it. But he doesn’t come near me. As soon as I cross the door’s threshold, he finally looks at me.

“Good night, Jude,” he says. “Sleep well.”

He closes the door and leaves me.

19

When my alarm rings, I just want to die.

I’m exhausted. I’ve barely slept, thinking about what happened in that bar. Eric’s words, his gaze, and how those men wanted me kept me awake. Finally, at about four in the morning, I took the vibrator out of my suitcase; and after playing around for a while, I managed to quench my desire.

Like the day before, Amanda, Eric, and I leave the hotel with a driver who takes us to the office to continue the meeting. I’m wearing slacks today. I don’t want a repeat of yesterday. As soon as he sees me, Eric looks me over, and though he only says, “Good morning,” I can tell by his tone he’s no longer upset.

During the hours we’re at the meeting, Eric and I only glance each other’s way a few times. He doesn’t send me emails today, nor does he stop the proceedings for any reason. I’m grateful.

At seven o’clock, when we get back to the hotel, I say good night to both him and Amanda and go up to my room. Someone knocks on my door. I open it and am not surprised to find Eric. He looks determined. He comes in, takes off his jacket, and throws it on the floor. He undoes his tie and takes me in his arms. He moves like lightning toward the bedroom.

“My God, sweetness ... I want you.”

There’s no need to say anything else. The desire is mutual, and the night is long and perfect.

When I wake up at six in the morning, Eric is gone. I’m beat from our sexual marathon and fall back asleep.

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