Page 57 of Tell Me What You Want, Or Leave Me

“Before the wedding, you promised him he could learn to ride a motorcycle,” I remind him.

“I know I promised. I just don’t know why you had to bring it back up.”

I know I’m very impulsive and I don’t think things through sometimes, but I’m not backing down on this one. “He would’ve asked me about it eventually, and I have a race with Jurgen in two weeks and—”

“You have a what?”

Uh-oh...

His brows freeze, and his body tenses up.

“I told you about this. You’ve known about it for a month. I told you Jurgen told me about the race, and you said you thought it would be fun if I took part. You even had my motorcycle brought over on your plane.”

“I did?” he says, surprised.

“Yes, you did, and if you can’t remember, that’s not my problem! But, look, the important thing now is to deal with Flyn.”

“He’s starting school, and I don’t want him to get distracted. Let’s wait until spring for motocross lessons.”

“What?”

“For the love of God, Jude, Flyn doesn’t care if he learns now or later.”

“What I promised—”

“Your promises are your business,” he says, cutting me off dryly. “And, in any case, both your and Hannah’s motorcycles are too big for him. We’d have to buy one that’s the right size for him.”

“Well...”

I learned on my father’s motorcycle, and here I am, not a scratch on me!

“Look, Jude, I understand he’s going to learn how to ride a motorcycle, but this is not the moment.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Jude...,” he hisses.

“Eric...,” I retort.

It’s been a little while since I felt this. He stares at me with his frosty Iceman gaze, and I feel my stomach jump. God, he really knows how to make me nervous. Just as I’m about to tell him I don’t want to argue, the phone rings. Eric picks up and gives me a sign to let me know it’s work.

I wait five minutes to see if we can finish our conversation, but when I see this is going to take a while, I step out of the office and go get a drink in the kitchen. Flyn is there, looking sad. He’s still holding the gift he made for Laura.

“I don’t want you and my uncle to argue.”

“Don’t worry about it, love.”

“But I heard my uncle get mad.”

“He’s mad because I reminded him I’m going to be in a motorcycle race, not because you’re going to learn how to ride a motorcycle,” I say, lying to his face. “Believe me, love, there’s nothing to worry about.”

“Yes, yes, there is. He’ll get mad, and then you’ll leave again.”

My grumpy little boy loves me and that touches me. I sit down next to him and make him look at me.

“Listen, Flyn, your uncle and I love each other very much, but we’re different in so many ways that it’s going to be very hard for us not to argue. And even if we argue, that doesn’t mean I’m going to leave. Because for me to leave him and you, it would have to be over something very, very serious, and I’m not going to let that happen, OK?”

He nods. I gather him in my lap. I’m still surprised we can be this close, and he hugs me and leans his head on my shoulder.

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