Page 75 of Tell Me What You Want, Or Leave Me

“Don’t get mad, my love.”

But I know my ability to tolerate this kind of stuff at times like this is pretty much zero.

“Then please leave and shut your trap.”

He gives me a kiss on the head and leaves. I close my eyes, put my headphones back on, and try to relax again, this time with Alejandro Sanz’s raspy voice.

That Friday, Juan Alberto, Dexter’s cousin, shows up in Munich.

I’m surprised to see him. Nobody had said anything about his coming.

“How did you leave my sister?”

He grins. “As beautiful as ever.”

But that isn’t enough for me.

“I mean, how does she feel about you leaving?”

“She’s fine, just fine. I promised to go by Jerez on my way back to Mexico. And she gave me this to give to you.”

He hands me a sealed envelope. I fold it and put it in my jeans pocket. Ten minutes later, I can’t wait any longer to see what my sister has to say. I sneak away to my room, sit on my bed, and open the letter.

Hello, Cuchufleta:

Everything’s great here. Papá is fabulous, Luz is happy with her school, and Lucía is growing and getting fat. I’m writing to tell you I’m fine even though Juan Alberto’s departure crushed me. You warned me. But I wanted to be a more modern woman, and, in spite of how sad I feel, I’m happy for having made this effort.

Just for the record: I didn’t sleep with him! I’m not quite that modern, even though it was more than just sweet and tender kisses between us. He’s a marvelous man, warm and charming. What’s certain is I’ve finally gotten the sour aftertaste of Jesús out of my mouth. Anyway, when you see Juan Alberto, be nice to him because he deserves it, OK?

I love you, Cuchu, and I promise I’ll call one of these days.

Raquel

I get all weepy.

My poor sister, heartbroken and afraid I’m going to take it out on Juan Alberto. Damn it, I can be so stupid sometimes. I immediately dial the house in Jerez. I want to talk with her. One ring...

Two rings...I finally hear her voice after the third ring.

“Are you OK, Raquel?”

I hear one of her teary sighs.

“Yes, I’m fine in spite of everything.”

“I told you, Raquel. I told you he was going back to Mexico.”

“I know, Cuchu, I know...”

After a somewhat meaningful silence, she surprises me. “You know what? I’d do it again. It’s been totally worth it to spend time with him. Juan Alberto is completely different from Jesús, and, even though I’m crying my heart out now, I realized he helped raise my self-esteem, and I see myself in a better light now. Is he OK?”

“Yes, I just saw him. He’s downstairs with Eric and Dexter and—”

“Well, give him a kiss for me, will you?”

“Of course.”

We talk for a few more minutes until Lucía starts to cry. When I go back downstairs, I see Graciela reading a magazine, and the men have disappeared. “They’re in the office,” she tells me.

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