Page 78 of Crossing Lines

“Jonah.” He brushed his finger pads up and down my back, then lowered his legs.

My spent cock slipped out of his warmth. “Yeah?” I kissed his shoulder, then lifted my head to gaze into his eyes.

“Have you ever loved someone before?” His gaze darted between my eyes.

Shaking my head, I said, “No. Not like this.” I pressed my lips together.I can’t believe I never told him that.I supposed it was inferred when I said I’d never been in a relationship, though.

“I’ve never loved like this before, either.” He tilted his head over the pillow and skimmed his knuckles down my cheek.

I caught his hand and kissed it. “But what about Laurent?” He’d said he’d loved him, right?

“When he was here…” He swallowed hard. “I realized what I had with Laurent pales to what I have with you.” He chewed his lower lip for a beat. “It took a long time for me to develop feelings for him.” He shrugged a shoulder. “I’d always chalked it up to my injury and the mess my head was in. But when I met you, things just clicked. I fought against it, but the first time I saw you?—”

“You knew you had to have me?” A smile teased my lips. We’d felt the same way. “Because the first time I saw you in the locker room,Iknew I had to haveyou.” My gaze searched his face. We’d talked some about his injury and the bad time thatcame after, but I didn’t feel like I knew the whole story. Sliding my knuckles down his cheek, I said, “Tell me more about that time. After you found out you couldn’t play hockey anymore.”

“Oh, well…” He huffed out a breath. “I was lost. My whole life had revolved around the game. I mean, my dad got me started in it.” He pursed his lips. “My dad played hockey all through college but never took it past his senior year. I guess he wasn’t good enough to keep going.” He turned his head and kissed my knuckles. “He ended up continuing his education in the physical therapy field. He’s the one who pushed me to play. Maybe he thought I could take it to a level he couldn’t.”

My heart ached for him. Here I was talking about going to medical school even though I was being scouted for the NHL. I was being given a chance neither he nor his father had. “Go on.” I studied him and the pain in his eyes.

“There was about a year where I didn’t give a shit if I lived or died. I couldn’t play hockey, my parents were fighting and talking about divorce, and my dad wasn’t happy about me being gay. So, I did a lot of drugs and almost drank myself to death.” He puffed out a breath and squirmed under me. “I can’t tell you how many times I woke up not knowing where I was or who I’d been with,” he said. “I woke up in vomit a few times. It’s a miracle I didn’t drown in it.”

I pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Jesus, it had been worse for him than I’d thought. “You’d never know it looking at you now.” I circled his shoulder with my fingers.

“In the middle of all that, I met Laurent at a gay bar. I was pissed out of my mind, and he took me home. He, uh, he’d seen me play hockey a few times. I was on a team with a friend of his.”

Nodding, I said, “And so you started seeing each other?” Laurent knew a side of Ryan I never would. No wonder they were still so close.

“Not at first. He became my friend. He got me help, therapy and shit. The guy can sell just about anything. And so, he soldme on going back to school to be a coach. He knew my reputation with the junior league was still intact and how much I loved the game.” He choked out a laugh. “Guess I have him to thank for where I am now.”

“Okay, so how long were you friends before you got together?” I’d had nothing to be jealous about with Laurent. I’d been so stupid and childish.

“I don’t know, maybe six months? He sort of grew on me.” He smirked, then it fell. “He was a little hurt when he found out I was already in love with you after just a few months.”

My heart bloomed with warmth. “You told him we were in love.” I kissed the tip of his nose.

A grin spread over his lips. “I told him I basically fell for you at first sight.”

The warmth in my chest grew. “Yeah? Well, it was mutual.” I curled a lock of his hair around my finger. “All my friends told me to stay away from you, that it was wrong to date a coach and all that shit. But I didn’t listen.”

“Yeah, Laurent and my mother were concerned. Well, Laurent thinks I could ruin my career.” He pressed his palm to my cheek and turned my gaze to his. “My mom is happy for me now, though. And I think Laurent is too.”

I gazed deeply into his eyes, the gray flecks inside the blue. No matter what happened, I’d never leave him, and we’d get through it all together. “It’s nobody’s business but ours.”

“Are you quotingBrokeback Mountainto me?” He quirked the corner of his mouth.

“Maybe.” I freed a soft snort. “I guess it seemed appropriate, given the way we have to hide our relationship.”

“Only for a few more weeks, depending on what happens at the Frozen Four.” His lips curled into a grin.

“Is it wrong to hope we lose our first game, so the season will be over faster?” I cocked a brow. I couldn’t wait for the day we could do something as simple as walk down Mill Avenue together, holding hands.

“Jonah, don’t even say that. Yes, it’s wrong. It’s wrong and selfish.” He slapped my shoulder. “Now, let’s clean up. I’m pretty messy down there.”

“Yeah, I came pretty hard.” I planted a quick kiss on his lips, then lifted off him, his sticky cum coating my chest.

After cleaningup and getting dressed, he walked me to his door. I wasn’t going to have time to see him until after the away game this weekend. “So, it sucks I won’t be traveling with the team this weekend.”

“Yes, but make sure to stream the game. I want a report from you when I get back on what you think we did well and where we made mistakes.” He grinned.

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