Page 57 of More Than a Spark

“Okay.” I shimmied out of my seat and slid in next to him, taking my beer with me. Propping my elbow on the table, I turned to face him. “If you don’t want to bottom, we’ll make it work.” We were best friends. We could work anything out, right?

Studying his beer, he rolled his lips. “I don’t know if I want to bottom or top yet. This is all pretty new to me.” He snuck a peek at me, then snaked his arm around my shoulders. “Milo, I want to make you happy. I guess that means I want to explore with you and find out what we both like. Does that make sense?”

I nodded, parting my lips. He was open to things and that was a start. “Okay, good. We’ll explore then.”

“What we’ve done so far has been a real turn on. I can’t imagine the rest of it will be any different.” He pressed his forehead to mine. “Because it’s you.” He ran his tongue over his lips, then pressed a kiss to my mouth. “So, let’s try some things and who knows?”

“Yeah, okay.” I lifted my head. What was he saying exactly? “I’ll bottom if you want me to Ryder, it’s no big deal.” And with him, it would be awesome anyways. I already knew that.

He slid his teeth over his lower lip. “We could try that first. B-but I do want to see what it’s like.” He huffed out a breath. “Fuck, I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore.”

A female server stopped by and dropped off a bunch of small condiment bowls with various kimchis in them and sauces, then lit the gas barbeque at our table.

“Food must be coming.” I placed my hand on his thigh. The conversation still didn’t feel right. “Ryder, whatever you want, I’ll be okay with it.”

With a shrug, he said, “I know, but like I said, I want to make you happy.” His gaze met mine. “I’m sure I’ll learn to like bottoming, right?” He lifted his brows.

I choked out a laugh. “You might actually love it. You never know.” I leaned into him. He was really worried about this. Did he think he wouldn’t be able to measure up? “I might really like bottoming for you, too.”

“Yeah, maybe we’ll be fighting about who’s going to bottom someday.” He rolled his eyes, then drank his beer.

“Oh, stop.” Flashing a smile, I slapped at his shoulder. If we were talking about it, it couldn’t be very far off when we might try it. “So…”

The server set a tray of thinly sliced marinated meats on our table, then showed us how to cook the meat and eat it.

After the server left, I turned a slice of pork with some tongs. We still had things to discuss, things that Ryder might not have even thought of. “Ryder, do you get tested?”

“Tested?” He held his beer glass up to his lips, eyeing me. “For what? Illnesses?” He cocked a brow, one side of his lips turning up. “Only if I’ve been exposed to something on the job and that’s only happened once.”

“Oh.” I set a few slices of cooked pork onto Ryder’s plate, then added some steak to the barbeque. Him getting sick on the job wasn’t something I’d even imagined could happen. “Like what sort of illnesses?”

He wrapped a slice of pork in lettuce and added sauces. “Like TB, SARs…” His gaze found mine. “HIV.” He bit into his food and moaned. “Holy shit, this is good.”

He was so matter of factly talking about HIV. “What, did you get exposed to it the one time?” With my chest growing tight, I turned the steak on the barbeque and it sizzled.

“TB. There was a house fire in a homeless shelter up in Flag and, fuck.” He shook his head. “I saw a guy outside in the yard passed out and I didn’t have all my gear on. I carried him to the paramedics, and I guess the guy had TB.” He ate another bite of food. “We were outside, so the risk was lower, but my Cap still wanted me tested.”

I stared at him. Shit, he was so used to saving people and risking his own life, it was no big deal to him. I set some steak on my plate and added more strips of meat to the barbeque, then sipped my beer. He also had no idea why I was asking about this. As I wrapped my steak in lettuce, I said. “I’m on a, I’m on PrEP. All the guys in the band are. Axel sort of started it.” As I bit into my food, I cut my gaze to his.

“Oh, shit.” His eyes grew wide, and he covered his mouth with the back of his hand. “That’s what sort of testing you’re asking me about.” Setting his food down, he said, “Yeah, I do an annual exam every year and test for STDs.”

Nodding, I set more pork on the barbeque. Funny, I was doing all the cooking tonight. “So, when was the last time?” Fuck, I did not want to know what he’d done with Tate, but at this point, I was pretty sure it hadn’t been a risk.

“Uh…last month I think?” He drank some beer. “Yeah, last month. The only person I’ve been with is you and—” His mouth dropped open. “—Fuck, Tate.” He winced. “We only gave each other blow jobs.”

With a jolt to my heart, I dropped the tongs onto the table. “Oh.” No wonder he’d wanted to do that right away.

“Sorry, Milo. Shit.” He picked up the tongs and turned the pork, then leaned in and kissed my head. “It was way better with you.” He gave me a cheeky grin and wrinkled his forehead. “Does that make it any better?”

With a soft snort, I rubbed my forehead. “Yes, I guess it does.” He wastryingto pull his foot out of his mouth anyways. “So, let’s get back on track. It sounds like we’d be okay not using condoms, am I right?”

“Sounds like it.” He narrowed his eyes at me and set some cooked pork on my plate, then added steak to the barbeque. “What was up with Archer? I take it you two?—”

“We used condoms and didn’t discuss it. The times I was with him, it was more of a hook up and I’m always careful.” I lifted my chin, taking a deep breath. I hadn’t been serious with anyone before and had never had a conversation like this. But…bareback? With Ryder? Fuck yeah. It made bottoming look that much more attractive.

“Okay, so I guess we don’t need to use condoms?” His voice lifted as he said the words and his brows rose.

“I don’t see a reason to.” My cock tingled. “How long is this movie we’re going to see?” I ate my food and downed it with some beer. Did we even have to see the damn movie? I adjusted my now hard cock in my shorts, bound up by the lacey underwear I’d picked specially for tonight.

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