Page 67 of A Forgotten Mistake

“Can you drop me off at my place to get my car?” Liam asks. “I have to go sign some stuff with the house before work tomorrow… unless you’re going with me and will be signing your name on it.”

“No, no, but after work, I’d love to break it in,” I say with a wink.

Liam hesitates. “We can go break it in right now.”

“Notbreak intothe house to break it in.”

“What if we go break it in tomorrow morning?”

“What are we breaking in?” Jesse asks as he walks out with us. “Matthew, Liam wants you to go break something in with him.”

Matthew hurries up to reach us. “Oh fun. Should I come just wearing my bathrobe? Jesse, an apron might be best for you.”

“I actually want to try out my sexy maid outfit since Gabriel is going as a sexy nurse and I don’t want to feel left out,” Jesse says.

Liam looks around in disgust. “Why have these people suddenly started interacting with me like I care about them in any way?”

“This is what having friends feels like,” I assure him.

Liam recoils. “Well, I want a fucking refund. It feels awful.”

“If you want to know why I do it, it’s because I get enjoyment out of watching the way your face twists up in disgust,” Jesse says. “I’m surrounded by dead people all day. I gotta get my kicks any way I can.”

“Don’t you work with Marge?” I ask.

“Yeah, but she’s so old and boring, she’s practically dead herself. Hell, the dead ones have more personality than she does,” Jesse whines. “So when I break free, I want to enjoy the misery of others.”

“That’s fine. I love misery, but not my own misery,” Liam says as he tries shooing them off like they’re feral cats. “Go stalk that Cameron guy. I’m confident he’s the culprit.”

“Oh, no, I’ve done my work for the day,” Jesse responds.

“My job was just to look pretty,” Matthew says as he pretends to do a hair toss.

“I liked it better when you were both intimidated by me. Let’s go back to those days. I miss those days.” Then Liam quickly gets in the car like that’s the only way to end any of this.

“I think we’re breaking him down,” Matthew says, pleased by this.

Jesse looks around, acting like he’s confused. “Oh… were we accomplishing something? I was just enjoying the fact that I could take my passive-aggressiveness out on someone who was even more passive-aggressive. Like I don’t have to feel guilty if it’s Liam I’m being mean to.”

“You’re so tiny and cute; how could you be passive-aggressive?” Matthew asks.

Jesse’s eyes narrow. “It’s from all of the people telling me I’m tiny and cute,” he says before heading toward his car.

Matthew hesitates before rushing after him. “I’m so sorry! It was a joke, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”

“I’m kidding, Matthew,” Jesse reassures him.

I slide into the passenger seat of my car. “I think those two would be cute together.”

Liam looks up and then peers all around, like he’s confused about which two I’m referring to. “I’m sorry… who? The only way Matthew would be cute is if he was with something sohideous it made him look cute. Like if it was between him and a worm, I’d be like ‘IguessI’d pick Matthew just because he has fingers.’”

“So you don’t choose him out of friendship or anything else. Just the fact that he has fingers.”

“Yeah. Like how the fuck else is he supposed to hand me his cream stick?”

I sigh and decide that Liam’s a lost cause. “So… we’re going back to get your car because you’re going to drive back to my house and then go sign some papers in the morning.”

“Correct.”

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