Page 141 of The Mercenary's Guide to Mishaps and Romance

“I’d really rather not,” she objects as I realize that this must be Jasmine.

“Too bad,” he says as he slaps some tape over her mouth and starts marching her on her way.

This is the woman who started it all… or was it my father who started it? Fuck if I know, and fuck if I even care at this point. I just want it to all go away. I just want it to be Tavish and me.

I want my mom and Sienna to be safe. I want everything to be okay.

I really don’t think I’m being too greedy.

When Leland reaches the door, Everly and Micah are already waiting. They give Leland a nod, so he starts knocking as quickly and obnoxiously as he can until I can hear Arthur yell, “What the fuck? What the absolute fuck do you need?”

Leland pushes the door open before shoving the woman in first while he adopts some odd high-pitched voice like he’s pretending to be her. “‘Papa! I need you to stop being such a little dick-faced piece of shit! I’m so glad I took after my mother and don’t look like you.’ Is what I assume she’d have said if I hadn’t taped her mouth shut. Funny, huh? I’m hilarious. I know. I know.”

Arthur jumps up, but Micah and Everly have a gun on him, and Leland has a gun on his daughter. “How the fuck did you get in here?”

“Let me tell you, but then we’d have to wind it back some years. Dark night, PI scuttling?—”

“Not that far back, dear god,” Micah says.

“Fuck. Fine. Wind it back an hour. We took our little boat and were likevrooooomand then we jumped off, and then I was like punchy strangle, and then I scurried inside and then your daughter was like ‘Ooh, Daddy sent me a stripper’ and I was like ‘Oh, you sweet summer child, I only strip foroneman.’ And then here we are.”

His retelling is significantly different than what I remember.

“We have one more guest coming and then we’re all set to go,” Leland says as he tosses some tape to Tavish. “Tape his ass to a chair. Leave his toes and fingers free in case I get bored and want to start taking them off.”

“I will have you killed,” Arthur growls.

“How?” Leland asks. “Don’t make me laugh. Look around you. You literally have no one left.”

Arthur grits his teeth. “Goddammit.”

Tavish pulls up another chair and helps Leland tape Jasmine to it. I’m assuming we’re waiting for Jackson and Cassel, but when the door opens, the last person I expect to be with them is my father.

“Dad?” I ask. “How the fuck did you end up here?”

“We brought him here,” Leland says.

“We did?” I ask in confusion.

“Yeah, he was in that box you tripped over.”

“But… I was… talking to him on the phone right before we left and then…”

“Yeah, Jeremy said he had to wait forever for you to finish talking before nabbing him. Jeremy and Henry then stuffed him inside the box. Henry claimed he didn’t want to do it, but he sure looked like he was having fun in the pictures Jeremy sent me. I’m almost disappointed I wasn’t there to watch,” Leland says with a sigh.

I watch as Dad is shoved down into a chair. And suddenly, I realize that these people who have fuckinghauntedme no longer look as terrifying as they once had.

“Let’s begin,” Tavish announces. He rips the tape off my father’s mouth as Leland gets the tape off Jasmine’s mouth.

“I will play judge, jury, and executioner,” Leland declares. “I have a secret, and it’s that I’m really fond of the executioner part, so please keep that in mind. And begin!”

Dad’s eyes latch on to mine. “Shawn, please, these people?—”

“Don’t you dare beg me,” I interrupt. “I lost all trust in you the moment you watched that man drag me away. I want to hear the goddamn truth. All I’ve heard are fucking lies.”

“I haven’t fucking lied,” Arthur says. “Your father tried killing Jasmine! I wasn’t aware it was him until about a month ago. She didn’t know either, and if she did, your father would be rotting in prison right now. Your father is the monster here.”

“I’m the monster? You had someone kill Nate to protect your deceiving monster of a child,” Dad yells.

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