Page 51 of Meet Me on Christmas Eve

I shouldn’t say anything. Or, I should say something vaguely comforting. Just to be a decent person. Not to dredge up the past. Just keep it light.

“I would’ve been there for you,” I said softly.

Why? Why did I say that? I put my face in my hands.

He scoffed and rose quickly from his seat before striding over to the window.

I didn’t know whether to follow him. He seemed almost angry, maybe even volatile. But why would he be?

I probably should give him some space. Definitely should.

“I would have …” I said, rising and then taking a few tentative steps in his direction. “You don’t believe me?”

Or maybe comfort from me would’ve been the last thing he wanted, and I was just embarrassing myself again. I sighed. “Terry?”

He didn’t respond at first, but I saw his chest rise and fall heavily as he breathed in and out, gazing out at the wintry landscape. Finally, he said, “I doubt it, but it doesn’t matter now.”

I walked the last few steps to stand next to him alongside the window. “I can’t believe you didn’t eventrythough. That you’d just assume …” I shook my head, unable to continue. Had he really had such a low opinion of me? Why? I must have massively misjudged our relationship.

He finally turned to me then, and his eyes were cold as they met mine. “Why would I have tried, Mariana?”

Stricken, I stumbled back. “I … because …” Because I thought we cared about each other. Because I thought we were in love, even. I couldn’t tell him any of these things. I didn’t understand any of this.

“I knew you’d probably blocked me. And even if you hadn’t … well, I wasn’t going to be seen as taking advantage of the situation to make you talk to me.”

Confusion washed over me, and I felt light-headed. “What?”

He stared at me for what felt like forever as I tried to make sense of his words. I gripped a chair nearby. “I … I need to sit down,” I mumbled.

He let out a heavy sigh. “Mariana. I didn’t bring you out here to upset you or dredge up the past. We both moved on, long ago. Let’s just leave it in the past where it belongs.”

I felt a stab of pain in my chest when he said we’d moved on. Maybe he had, but me? No, I obviously hadn’t. I had been kidding myself for many years. Sure, I’d dated some, but I’d never fallen in love, not since him. I’d never even wanted to fall in love or … honestly, to feel any strong feelings that had the power to break me like that again.

But why … I had to know. To put this to rest, for good. “Terry, no. I think … well, I need to know something.” I waited until he made eye contact again, his expression cautious. “I didn’t block you. Why did you think that?”

His eyes searched mine for a moment before he looked away. “Seriously? What else was I supposed to think?”

I forced myself to keep looking at him and breathe steadily. “Well, considering how often I contacted you, how could younotthink I wanted to talk to you?” And then I had to ask the question that was burning in my mind, even while I felt my eyes become moist. “And why didn’t you meet me at Christmas?”

Chapter 15

Ilooked at his wide eyes as he exhaled softly.“I washere. Like we planned,” I continued, hardly caring that a tear was dangerously close to escaping from my eyelid. “I never blocked you, but I did give up after that. How could I not?”

I had to look away for a moment and dabbed at my eyes. When I looked back at him, his jaw had dropped.

He cleared his throat, his eyes intent and never leaving mine. “You’re serious,” he said slowly.

My brow furrowed, but before I could respond, he held up his hand and placed it briefly on my shoulder. “Mariana, I … I believe you, somehow. But I never got any messages from you.”

My eyebrows scrunched together as I took this in. “You never—”

“Ever.” I saw his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed hard. “I think we were connected on social media at first, but then you either blocked me or deleted your accounts, I wasn’t sure. But emails, texts, calls … you never reached out. I called you all the time, sent you so many messages. I even called the resort eventually, but the manager at the time wouldn’t give me any information.”

It’s a good thing I wasn’t the fainting type. My heart was racing and my brain was in overdrive at this news. He believed me. And yet, his experience was the opposite. Somehow, I think I believed him. “What … how—I mean, I don’t understand. How is this possible?”

He took both my hands and then looked back up to my face. “Do you trust me?”

I looked into those gorgeous dark eyes, the ones I’d get lost in every day if I could. I just nodded.

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