Page 5 of Oh No, My Kidnapper Is Hot!

I try to headbutt him instead. He jerks his chin out of range.

“You’re gettin’ on my nerves,” he says as he walks us further into the building. Contrarily, he sounds less angry than he did earlier. An undercurrent of amusement threads through his words. Hmm. That definitely wasn’t there before. I risk a quick glance at his face to check. He doesn’tlookamused. He doesn’t look angry either, though. He looks… bored? My brows draw together. That can’t be right.

I take another peek at him. Yep. Bored.

Unbelievable.

Only amanwould have the audacity to kidnap awoman and then act bored the moment he’s got her secured.

“I wouldn’t be getting on your nerves if you had left me on the street where I was happily minding my own business.” I turn my head to bite him, and I manage to get a mouthful of his shoulder. It isn’t exactly prime chomping real estate, but I hope it might inspire enough shock to get him to drop me again.

It doesn’t.

“You’re not here to flirt,” he says.

Ack! Abort! Abort!

I snap my head back and glare at him. He doesn’t look bored now. No, now he’s smiling. My jaw drops. I thought this man was piping when he was giving grouch, but that smile? It’s mischievous and amused, and I’ve never seen a man look more attractive. It’s the kind of smile people would kill for.

How can someone so horrendous be so freakinghot?

I can’t even find it in me to be surprised. Everything about this situation is just so…classic Millie.

Of course I’ve been kidnapped. Of course my kidnapper is the largest, strongest man alive. Andof coursehis face could rival every movie star I’ve ever seen. Why not? This is a comedy, right?

He could crush me like a bug, you say? Yup, makes sense. He’s the image of my every fantasy come to life, you say? Of course he is.Of course. Why wouldn’t he be? This is The Millie Show where everything is bad and the writers love to laugh at my expense.

“Breathe, Millicent,” he bosses me, that smile still in place. A little bit of a southern drawl comes through in his voice, making my name seem like it goes on forever.

It’s simply not fair. Not a single bit of it.

I tear my eyes off his stupid beautiful smile and take abreath. Not because he told me to or anything. Just because that’s what one does normally. People breathe. All the time. Totally nothing weird about me needing a good inhale…

Anyway.

Accepting that I probably won’t be able to fight this man, I have a look around instead.

We’re in a small house. Grouchy is walking us toward a short hallway, past a tidy kitchen and living room. A wall of windows bring in lots of natural light and displays what I’m sure would be a beautiful picture of the forest if it weren’t for the fact that I’m seeing it against my will. Nothing like an abduction to put a damper on a nice view.

We reach the hallway and pass a door to the right, going straight to a cracked one at the end. He uses his foot to tap it open, and just like that we’re in a bedroom – his bedroom, I presume. I tense.

“Absolutely not,” I say. He glances down at me, brows furrowed.

“’Absolutely not’ what?”

I respond through clenched teeth. “If a single piece of my clothing comes off, I’m going to permanently damage a part of your body you will not want permanently damaged. I don’t care if I die doing it.”

He stumbles, then stops.

“I’m not going to take off your clothes!” he proclaims, seemingly horrified. I glare at his chin.

“You better not.”

“I’m not!”

Yeah, because criminals are well known for their honesty.

“I’m not,” he repeats.

---