Page 56 of Embers in Our Past

“What?”

“The guy loves you, and it’s completely obvious by the way you’re telling me you’re pregnant with his child that you still have feelings for him. You’re being foolish,” he says, and I can’t help but feel attacked.

“Excuse me?” I put my water down and look at him with my mouth agape.

“Listen, you know that when it comes to me, I’m going to be honest, and that’s just what our friendship means. I’m not going to sugarcoat it with you. You’re being foolish thinking you can have this man’s baby and ignore that you still love him. Because you do. And he loves you. You’re going to what? Have his child and just be miserable, for what? To prove a point? To be stubborn?”

“You have some nerve,” I say, grabbing my things, about to storm out.

“No, Abby, you don’t get to walk away because I’m saying things you don’t like to hear. No, sorry. Marissa can tell you she doesn’t agree, but I can’t? That’s not fair. Also, as much as Clay may think I’m not his friend, I actually see his side. I see why things were hard for you too. I can be on both of your sides from what you’ve told me and be your friend,” he says, grabbing my wrist, trying to keep me from leaving.

I hate that he’s right. He’s entitled to his opinion, but it pisses me off that he’s not wrong about how I feel about Clay. And I think I hold a lot of guilt that I can’t just let go of and run back to Clay—that a part of me is holding on to this need to stay firm in my decision to be in this solitary life I have chosen. I deserve to suffer because I did this to us. I’m using this as a punishment, which is just cruel for both of us.

Does it make sense? No. Am I doing anything to fix it? Still no. Am I hormonal and letting it continue to rule my decision-making? Yes.

I put my stuff down and sit back down. “Sorry, I overreacted.”

“It’s fine. You’re pregnant, so I’ll let it slide. I’ve watched three of Rios’s sisters go through it. They were nightmares. You’re just beginning, and this is just the tip of the iceberg.” He gives me crazy eyes, and I swear I want to throw something at his head. I’m contemplating the napkin holder, but there are witnesses, so I decide against it.

“Rios is the one who figured out I was pregnant, actually.”

“You ran into Rios, huh? Well, the fact he figured it out doesn’t surprise me. He’s got some weird sixth sense about it,” Malloy says as he waves the server over. “I hope you’re ready to order because I need food. If not, we need to get fries or something. Amanda keeps giving me the stalker vibes, and we can’t be here longer than the regular diner allowed time—if you catch my drift.”

“What can I get you?” Amanda says. She showed up so quickly I barely had time to process what was happening.

“Yes, we’ll get a basket of fries to start. Abby, do you know what you want, sweetie?” He looks over at me to play along. The moment he brings his hand to touch mine, I see Amanda deflate.

“Yes,pumpkin.” My tone is dripping sarcasm. “I’ll have the chicken Caesar salad with the tortilla soup. Thanks,” I say, handing over the menu.

“I’ll have the ultimate burger with onion rings.” He gives her a tight smile, then winks at me.

She scurries off, and once she’s out of earshot, he pulls his hand away. “Thank you. She wouldn’t stop looking at me, and I swear she was freaking me out a bit there. I had to make her think we were together.” I swear he shivers a bit at the end of his statement. It’s hard not to laugh at his dramatic behavior.

“Okay, what’s your update?” I ask because I need to know what’s going on with Baylee. I haven’t gotten to see him much since we last hung out. Life has been a bit hectic for me, and he’s been working crazy hours lately.

“Oh, quite a bit. Not good news like yours though.” He pulls his hat off and moves his hand through his ginger hair, then puts his ball cap back on backward. “My mom has cancer.”

The lump that forms in my throat is immediate and I can’t control the tears that start to form in my eyes. I wish I could blame the damn pregnancy hormones, but I can’t. I’m devastated for him. Malloy’s father is not in the picture, and he was raised by a single mother. It was only his older brother and mother his entire life. His brother is a lawyer out in Ohio, so he’s been closest to his mother. This is devastating to hear.

“Oh, Malloy, I’m so sorry.” I grab his hands and squeeze. “What kind? What stage?”

“It’s stage three, they just found out. Lung cancer.” He swallows thickly, and I can see the devastation across his face. He looks absolutely grief-stricken with the news, and I’m gutted for my friend.

“What’s the prognosis? Can they give you any information?” I know nothing about this type of cancer.

“That’s the thing, it’s not great.” He bows his head. “There’s no cure for this kind of cancer. She’s never smoked a day in her life, but she got lung cancer. She’ll have to do a few rounds of chemo. Then we’ll reevaluate and see if she needs to do any other type of therapy, but they gave her about five years.”

His eyes are shining with unshed tears, and my heart is aching for my friend.

“I don’t even know what to say. What can I do?” I ask because I feel helpless.

“Nothing. Just listening is enough.” He looks out the window, lost in thought. “I’m asking for a transfer closer to her. Right now, it’s too much being twenty miles out. It doesn’t seem like a lot, but I don’t want to be that far away. Some guys don’t mind the commute, but right now, living where I am, outside the city, the traffic can delay me quite a bit, depending on the time of day. I just put in the papers, and I’m waiting to see where I’ll go. As long as I’m closer to home here in the city, it’s better than being out in Dover. It’s just too far right now from my mom.

“My brother can’t be here right now. He’s about to propose to his girlfriend, and I just don’t want to put his life on hold. He’s done so much to help raise me throughout the years. He deserves his time now. I just can’t interrupt the life he’s built.” He moves his hands down his face, and I can see the turmoil.

“But if you need the help, you should ask for it,” I tell him.

“Eric has done so much for me, Abby. I was a tough kid growing up. I was resentful because I never had a father figure around. I gave my mother and brother hell. Rios and I were always stirring up trouble. I don’t know how we ended up making a career out of our poor behavior because we were little shits.” He chuckles at the memory.

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