Page 3 of All Jacked Up

Ransom: Can’t have that. Who else is gonna listen to me bitch?

Standing in the overgrown grass, I glanced up at the trailer I lived in with my mother and her boyfriend, Dick—that was his actual name, and he had been the longest relationship she’d had. They were going on five years now, and I couldn’t wait to leave this place because he was, in fact, a dick. Mom hadn’t remembered my birthday. In fact, Ransom was the only person who had wished me a happy one or said anything to me about it at all.

Me: I’m sure you could wrangle Than into it.

I bit my bottom lip as I waited for his response.

Ransom: Do you read the things I text you, Shakespeare? Or just toss out random advice and comments, hoping they stick?

I laughed as I replied.

Me: Eh, sometimes. When I have the time, I’ll give them a read, but mostly, I skim.

Ransom: It’s a relief turning seventeen didn’t change you. You’re still a ray of fucking sunshine.

Ransom: How are you celebrating?

He’d gone to school with me. Although he hadn’t been aware of my existence until his senior year, everyone who went to my high school was aware of my lack of a social life. So that wasn’t a secret. But I didn’t need him knowing my home life was so horrid that school was a place for me to escape.

Me: Oh, you know, big party. Lilliana is hosting it at her million-dollar estate, and the entire student body is attending. There will be a three-tiered cake and dancing. There is even a rumor that Keanu Reeves is making an appearance.

Ransom: How did I not know you liked old men?

I laughed out loud.

Me: Excuse me. John Wick is not an old man.

His response was immediate.

Ransom: Good luck with snagging a proposal from Grandpa. But, damn, Lilliana? You need better friends.

He knew good and well that this was all a fabricated story. Lilliana didn’t know my name.

Me: She doesn’t stalk me. Thankfully, I didn’t spend any locker room time with her.

Ransom: Lucky you.

Me: Subject change, but you might want to take a screenshot of what I’m about to say because it is a rare moment when I find a reason to compliment you …

Me: You’re a way better Literature student than your brother. He’s oneof the most difficult I’ve had to tutor.

And that wasn’t a lie. Than struggled with keeping his attention onThe Great Gatsbypaper he had to write. Starting with him not actually reading the book.

Ransom: You’re tutoring Than? Since when?

Me: We had our third session yesterday, and I’m starting to think he expects me to write the paper for him.

Ransom: Don’t.

Me: You know me. Would I do that for anyone?

Ransom: He’s got a charisma I do not have.

I disagreed.

Me: Charisma gets you nowhere with me.

Ransom: So, you’re a bitch to everyone, not just me?

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