Page 33 of Until I Break

“Oh shit,” I pant. “My God.”

“How are you now?” Ryan asks.

“So much fucking better,” I say, still gasping for air.

“I think Erica is here. She was coming in for the quarterly meeting anyway,” Ryan says.

“You said you fucked her?” I ask.

“Yes, but not now,” Ryan says.

“Why’s that?” Calder asks with a grin.

“Yeah, Ryan. Why?” Julian parrots.

“Because I am not the type to fuck around with multiple people at once,” Ryan replies.

“But you will fuck her again when you are done with me?” I ask. I don’t know why I am asking. Thinking about that hurts more than it should. He doesn’t say anything, and it pisses me off, so I scoff and stand up to go to the bathroom. I grab clothes on the way and lock myself in before they can get to me. I hear voices outside of the door, but I ignore it and get into the shower. I stay there to boil away my anger for a while before getting dressed and drying my hair. Eventually, I leave the office and go down to the kitchen.

As I am preparing a turkey sandwich, I hear footsteps behind me. “Go away,” I say, knowing it’s Ryan. As I suspected, Ryan turns me around, but I immediately shove him back. “Stop it.”

“Choose your words carefully, Liza,” Ryan says calmly.

“No. Fuck you. You don’t get to come in here and fuck with my head. I don’t need anyone else fucking with me. You either want me or you don’t. I am not something that should be used and thrown away. I am worth more than that,” I yell at him.

“Are you done?” Ryan asks.

“Really?!”I scream at him. “Are you fu…”

Ryan shuts me up by suddenly grabbing my face and kissing me hard. I offer no resistance before melting into him. When he pulls back, he rests his forehead on mine. “I’m sorry I made you think I didn’t want you. I do want you, and I know you want the same. All three of us are sucked into your orbit, and I have no desire to ever leave. You three are the only ones I will ever fuck again. Okay?”

“Okay,” I whisper. He wraps me in a hug and holds onto me for a second before stepping back. I see Erica standing with Calder and Julian, and I frown deeply at them before I can control my face. I am having to remind myself that it was fake.

“Hey, Eliza,” Erica says tentatively.

“Hi,” I say, unable to fix my attitude.

“Show her your tattoos before she stabs you,” Ryan laughs.

“Right,” she says nervously.

“Oh,” Calder says before slapping his hand over his eyes and doing the same to Julian. I can’t help but laugh at them before looking back at Erica. She turns away from me before pulling her shirt off.

“Damn. That’s beautiful,” I say when I see that every inch of her back is covered with flowers, skulls, and vines. “That was definitely fake.”

Erica pulls her shirt back on before turning to look at me. “I’m so sorry anyone would ever do that to you,” Erica says gently.

“Erica… You’re just as much a victim in this too,” I say. “Sorry if I am coming off as a cunt. I don’t mean to.”

“I get it. I would be pissed too, even if I did believe them,” she says. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Short of helping me murder him and hiding his body, not really,” I say. “He is volatile, and I don’t want anyone getting hurt.”

“I think we are reaching a point where we need to get the police involved,” Julian says.

“I agree,” Calder adds.

“So, what, do we just go and say he made a fake video?” I ask.

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