Page 84 of Scorching Sienna

“Are you the murderer?”

“No,” she replies, shaking her head. “But I’m the reason behind them.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t be a martyr in this situation. Taking on the responsibility of something that was out of your hands. That’s like the mother of a murderer saying she is responsible for the deaths of the people her son or daughter kills just because she gave birth to the being that carried them out. It's out of your hands, sunflower, and you cannot claim the responsibility just to appease your morality. That’s claiming an untruth which is fundamentally going against the very morality you are trying to save.”

She is struggling with my words. It is even harder for her to accept because she has feelings for me.

“It may not be what you want to hear, but none of it is important. What I do is just a job. It must be hard to hear, but that is how it is. I will not lie to you by telling you that I lie awake at night and mull over what I have done. I don’t. My heart is black with my deeds. But,” I say, taking a step towards her.

“You are the most important to me. The most valuable thing in mywhole life. This is not a declaration of love because, make no mistake, I do love you, Sienna. It is a declaration of something far deeper than that. It is knowing that in this second and every second from now until my last breath, you will always be the person I want. Nothing, ever, that you could do would change that. I really want you to comprehend and understand every word I am saying. There is no me without you now. Even if you wanted it. Even if I wanted it.”

Sienna’s mouth has dropped open in shock, her eyes still wide as she looks at me in disbelief.

“You love me,” she finally says.

“More than that, Sienna. Mere mortals created language, trying to express emotions by wrapping them up in symbols. Vowels and consonants. What I feel for you is more than those three words alone can convey.”

“Close your eyes.” Sienna looks at me, hesitating to do as I ask before finally, her eyes flutter shut. I take another step towards her.

“Obsession. To think of you every second of the day. With every mental, emotional, and physical act of my day wrapped around you at its core. I would do anything for you. Anything. There is no limit to that with me. When I say anything, it means that definition exactly. It doesn’t have any exclusions or conditions.” Step.

“Desire. To think that before you, I thought I knew what this was. But that was child's play to the craving you have created within me. I want you so much, in every way, that when I think about that want, it manifests as a physical feeling in my body. A delicious tightness in my chest, as if my want is so strong it is stealing my breath. Smothering me. My heart skips a beat, that misstep making way for your light. That is the power of my desire for you.” Step.

“Curiosity. Something I have never experienced with another person until you. To want to know everything about you. Good and bad.Every secret. Every thought. Until you are bare to me, and I am bare to you. Because I want you, and only you, to know me similarly.” Step.

“Bewitching. You are the most beautiful human in existence. You may not see that, but if you saw yourself through my eyes, which were made to see and worship that beauty, you would see what I mean. When I saw you at Nero’s, it was like seeing color for the first time. It was like being born and opening my eyes for the first time.” Step.

I’ve closed the distance now, with only inches separating us. Up close, I notice the color has returned to her cheeks, and her breathing is rapid and shallow, causing her chest to rise and fall quickly. I have an impact on her. Good. Because she affects me.

Her lips part slightly as her tongue darts out to wet them.

When I look down, she is clenching her thighs and rubbing her hands against the fabric of her dress. I wanted to change her into something more comfortable when I carried her in earlier, but there wasn’t time.

I smirk and dip my head forward so my cheek grazes hers until my mouth is right by her ear.

“I love you, Sienna. But these other words help those three.”

She shivers and then moans when I pull away, her eyes flying open.

While I had planned on something else tonight, Sienna needed rest and time to process everything. If I gave into this moment and took her to bed and fucked her as her eyes and whole body were begging me to do, she would hate me and herself tomorrow.

“Have a bath and get some rest. I have some work to do.” Just before I leave the room, I slowly turn to face her.

“Think carefully about everything I have said. There is no escaping me, Sienna. It’s a matter of you coming to terms with that and seeing there is no other option. I can see that’s what you want, you just need to take the step from lying to yourself to being true to yourself. Isuggest looking at what your heart says instead of your head.”

And with those words and the confused expression on her face, I leave. But, as usual, I don’t go far.

Chapter 22

Light

“My god. I know I am married to your brother, but damn, that man is fine. Even my kids are enamored.”

Dee’s voice pulls my gaze from the same view I have been ogling, the cucumber I am supposed to be cutting gripped tightly in my fist. I put it down on the chopping board and blush, feeling like a child being caught doing something naughty.

“Don’t be embarrassed. It’s a miracle you get anything done with him around.” She laughs, and I relax, focusing on the task at hand.

But like a magnet, my gaze drifts over to the man sitting casually in the chair outside. My nephew bounces on one leg merrily while my niece rests against his chest, his hand rubbing her back softly while she sleeps. As usual, he looks relaxed, as if handling two children is a gentle breeze on a summer day, a daily occurrence. The heat of the day means he is in only a T-shirt, as opposed to the suits he usually wears, and the contrast between his tattooed hands and arms and the innocent children he is handling so delicately makesthe view even more enticing—a stark contradiction if ever there was one.

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