Page 210 of Nanny and the Beast

"It must have been scary," I say.

"I wasn't scared," Rosalie says. "James peed himself, though."

"Only a little bit," James says defensively.

"Both of you were so brave," I say. "I'm proud of you. And...I love you."

Their little faces are squished against my neck as they tell me they love me too.

There are a million things going on in my heart now. It's glowing and growing and changing. I don't know what to make of it.

I lift both kids into my arms and head toward the ambulance.

They're about to take Emma to the hospital.

The woman who taught me how to love, how to open my heart to other people, is now unconscious. And in this moment, I know one thing for certain—I'll let her break my heart over and over again if it means I'll get to see her pretty eyes again.

I sit inside the ambulance with both of the children in my lap.

Emma's grandmother and Helena insist on coming to the hospital, too. Alaric offers to drive them in his car.

On the way to the hospital, thekids fall asleep with their heads resting on my chest.

I reach for Emma's hand. It's so cold to the touch.

The medics assured me that she's going to be okay, but there are no words to describe this restlessness inside me.

Nothing else matters now.

I tried to convince myself that it was never love, but there's no other word to describe what I'm feeling right now.

I love this girl.

45

EMMA

Everything is white.

Bright fluorescent lights shine down on me, making my eyes burn. I try to lift my hand to shield my eyes, but my hand feels weighed down.

My throat feels parched. There's also a dullpounding at the back of my skull.

I glance down at my hand. I instantly forget about every discomfort.

There's a large hand resting over mine. Klaus is asleep in an armchair next to my bed, holding my hand in his sleep. I don't know what this means.

I stare at him for a moment.

Everything comes rushing back—the words he said, the secrets he kept, our stolen moments. I thought I knew him, but I was wrong. He's a man who set up secret cameras in my bedroom. He's a man who didn't keep his word. He told me that he would protect me, but nothing ever hurt me quite like he did.

Also, I think he knows about the woman in the wedding dress.

I think she was one of his secrets.

I glance down at his hand over mine. It's a sweet, innocent gesture.

I'm not supposed to let my heart feel this way, but I feel it all anyway.I'm helpless against the rush of emotions that invade my body. If it's so wrong, I don't understand why it feels so right.

---