Page 189 of Nanny and the Beast

I feel hollow inside as I say the words out loud. I'm trying to switch the pain to anger, but I just feel so numb inside. I really thought what we had was something special.

And if I'm being honest, a big part of me still hopes this is all just abad dream.

"I still think you should talk to her about it," he says.

"What's the point?" I say. "There's nothing left to salvage in this relationship."

Every time I close my eyes, I see her dancing with that man. I can't erase the image from my head.

"Don't you want to hear her side of the story?" he asks.

"Not one bit," I say. "I know it'll just piss me off even more. And besides, asking her to explain it would be pathetic."

"Don't let your ego ruin a good thing, man," he says. "Trust me on this."

"It's not about my ego. It's about what she did," I say. "It's not something I can forgive. You know this about me."

"But she wasn't even with anyone else," he says.

"Working at a place like Elysium, it was only a matter of time," I say. "I want nothing to do with her. The right thing to do would be to fire her."

"What's stopping you?" he asks.

"The kids." I swallow. "They're fond of her. She brings out the best in them. She might have been trying to use me, but I know she cares about the kids."

I have cameras all over this house. I've seen the way she is with them when nobody is watching. I know that it wasn't all an act.

"That's very mature of you," Alaric says.

"I can't believe I was being played this whole time," I say. "I told myself I wouldn't let another woman make a fool out of me, but here I am."

"You're being a drama queen," Alaric says. "It might feel like it right now, but it's really not the end of the world."

When I learned that my high school girlfriend wasn't faithful, it bruised my ego. With Emma, it feels like my very soul is bruised. Everything is black and blue.

"I know it's a cliché, but everything heals with time," he says.

"Oh really?" I ask. "Is that why you're still pining after the girl you met over a decade ago?"

I know it's uncalled for, but I just want to be in a bad fucking mood for a little while. I don't want to make the best of the situation. I just want to sit here and stew in my negativity.

Alaric came here with the intention of trying to make me feel better, but the opposite is happening.

I'm dragging him down to my level.

He stares at the window now even though it's still dark outside and there's nothing to look at.

There's a knock on my door.

"Come in," I say.

Helena steps inside, holding a tray of pancakes. It's accompanied by bowls of fresh butter and blueberry jam.

"I made breakfast," she announces in a cheerful voice.

"Helena, that's wonderful, but it's four in the morning," I say.

Alaric grins at Helena. "You're an angel. We don't deserve you."

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