He looks so haunted right now. He looks so consumed by the pain inside him.
I’ve been there before. I’ve been in his shoes more times than I can count. And it’s not something I’d wish on my worst enemy.
“You had no way of knowing it would end like this,” I say. “You made a mistake.”
“I swear, if I could go back in time, this is the first thing I would undo,” he says.
“Alaric, look at me,” I say.
He lifts his eyes to mine.
“What you did was terrible and thoughtless and completely stupid,” I say. “You destroyed everyone’s life and?—”
“I don’t know if you’re trying to make me feel better, but if you are, you’re doing a horrible job at it,” he mutters.
“What I’m trying to say is that I forgive you,” I say. “I forgive you for what you did, and I forgive you for keeping it a secret.”
“Really?” Alaric blinks a couple of times.
I nod.
If there’s one thing I learned after everything that happened, it’s that life is too short to hold grudges. Especially when it involves the people you actually care about and want to keep in your life.
“I’m so relieved,” Alaric says. “I thought you were going to stop talking to me, and even thinking that made me sick to my stomach. Because you’re like one of the only people I can actually stand in this world.”
“You’re one of the only people I can stand too,” I say.
“Can I hug you?” Alaric asks.
“Five seconds,” I say.
My friend launches himself into my arms, holding me tightly.
I don’t see war and chaos anymore. I’m not transported to my past. My feet are firmly rooted to the ground. My mind is right here in this present moment.
“Your five seconds are up,” I say.
“No, they’re not,” Alaric says, holding me tighter. He glances over my shoulder and pulls away. “Fuck, this guy is going to bleed to death. I need to call a doctor.”
As he calls his doctor, I can’t help but think about how much I’ve changed in the past few months.
I’m able to hug the people I love. My heart is able to forgive easily. I’m able to see that other people are human and that they make mistakes sometimes.
It’s a shame that the person who taught me this is nothing more than a stranger again.
Even though everything is different now, it’s like we never even happened.
It’s like we were never even in love.
43
EMMA
It’s the middle of the night.
I can’t help but wonder if he’s at Elysium. Even thinking about him with other girls makes bile rise up my throat.
Klaus never belonged to me, but I never wanted anything more than I wanted him.I wanted us to beat all odds and end up together. Because all of these feelings in my chest have nowhere to go. They’re trapped inside me now, forever a part of me.