Page 73 of Level Me Up

Chapter Thirty-eight

Morgan

Shortly after the heart-to-heart with my dad, I find myself alone. If I think about what I've been told, it's the first time I've been truly alone since I was admitted to the hospital. I stare out the window and watch the sun get lower in the sky. It's just past 6:00 p.m., and the sun is already setting over the beautiful Chicago skyline.

There is a gentle knock at the door, which startles me.

"Come in," I say. It feels strange saying that from a hospital bed.

The door opens and finally, after what seems like forever, Dex walks in. I feel the smile grow on my face as I take him in. While I can tell he hasn't slept in days, he still looks handsome with the days-old scruff on his face. I find his eyes and they are full of relief, but then I realize that he isn't coming any closer. He stops just shy of the foot of my bed. If I could, I would crawl out of this bed this instant and go to him. I want to feel him wrapped around my body so badly it hurts more than any physical pain.

He pulls in a deep breath and then releases it. He almost looks conflicted. My smile falls, and anxiety flutters in my belly. Something is wrong.

"Hey," he finally says.

"Hi."

"You have no idea how happy I am to see you awake, Morgan."

"Yeah, sorry it took me so long."

His face softens at that, but he still doesn't smile.

I don't know what to do or say. Only seconds ago, I wanted to be engulfed in him. For the last hour, all I could think about was how I was going to tell him the truth and hope for the best, but now I'm speechless.

"I'm sorry, Morgan," he says with a grimace.

Tears start to fill my eyes. "For what?" I ask sounding stronger than I feel.

"For not being there with you. For making you come to me in the first place. I should have been at your door fighting for you since the night we broke up." He grips the railing at the foot of my bed. "If I had fought for us, then the past month without you wouldn't have been hell to get through. If I had fought for us, then I wouldn't have spent the last three days sick to my stomach and scared to death that I wasn't going to see or talk to the love of my life ever again." His knuckles are white, and his eyes are red-rimmed.

Tears stream down my face at his admission.

"Morgan, I'm so, so sorry," The words come out in a choked whisper.

"Why are you so far away?"

"What?"

"All I've wanted since you walked out of my apartment, was you. All I could think about was you and how I just wanted to be close to you again, to touch you. For the past week, I’ve been ready to get you back. And now you're here, right in front of me, yet you're so far away."

He moves quickly, then, and he is beside me now, with his hands on each side of my face looking down at me. I can see now that the red-rimmed eyes are from unshed tears and not just exhaustion.

"Morgan, I love you so much. So much. I can't lose you, again."

"I love you too, Dex." The relief that floods through his entire body is palpable. I can feel his tension dissipate. "And you won't; not ever again. I'm yours forever."

He crushes his lips to mine. My face is already wet from tears, and the kiss isn’t sweet and romantic. At that moment, it feels like a kiss of life or death. It is carnal and harsh. I will never forget this kiss.

I reach my hands to his arms because I need to touch him, to feel him, but I'm greeted with a sharp, stabbing pain through my body, and I let out a cry.

He breaks the kiss and pulls away. "Shit, Morgan, I'm sorry. Where does it hurt? Are you ok? Do I need to call for a nurse?" he asks through panicked concern as he searches my face then body for the source of the pain.

"No, it's my ribs. I forgot that it hurts to move." I try to laugh it off, but it hurts really, really bad.

He shoves a hand through his perfectly messy hair in worry.

"That kiss was so worth it though. I've missed kissing you." I smile up at him through the pain.

He smiles and leans his head down so his forehead is touching mine and says, "I'm never going to stop kissing you, babe."

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