Page 40 of Level Me Up

“I know. He’s my favorite. I’m trying, but I miss Dex.” I’m surprised at the amount of whine in my voice as I say this.

“Link said that they are back at the hotel for the night. You should call him.” Ruby suggests.

“What? You’ve talked to Link? When?” And why the hell hasn’t my boyfriend called me, or at least texted me?

“He texted me about an hour ago. They won the tournament and are now hanging out back at the hotel with other…I don’t know, gamer people probably.” She replies, still watching Captain America, Iron Man, and Thor on screen.

But I just stare down at my phone, willing it to ring now, because I don’t know whether or not to be mad or depressed.

“He’s probably just overwhelmed with celebrations. I’m sure if you stop thinking about it, he’ll call you when he gets back to his room,” Gia croons.

“Oh!” Ruby jumps in her seat at the other end of the couch, “I know! Sext him! That will get his attention.” She is now facing me, The Avengers forgotten.

“No.” I snort and stifle an eye roll.

“Why not? All it takes is a sexy selfie and an ‘I’m thinking about you’ message, and he’ll be all yours.”

I bit my lip. Am I actually contemplating this? I glance questioningly at Gia.

“Hey, don’t look at me. If you really want to talk to him, you should try it. What’s it gonna hurt?” she shrugs.

“I guess you’re right,” I mumble.

Ruby claps with excitement, “Just go send him a picture of your boobs, no nipples, though. Make sure you get your mouth in the shot too and bite your lip. Then tell him you’re thinking about him. That should be all it takes.”

I stand up from the couch; the blanket I was wrapped in falls from my lap. “Ok. I’m gonna do it. But I’m not coming back out here because it is kinda embarrassing that you guys know what I’m about to go do. So, good night.”

Gia just smiles and shakes her head and turns back to the TV and with a giggle, Ruby adds, “Oh, you will have a good night, my love!”

As I close the door to my room, I feel my blood pressure spike with nerves. I’ve never taken a provocative photo of myself, and now, not only am I gonna take one, I’m going to send it to someone. I swear under my breath, am I really going to do this? Ugh. Yes. I am. Because obviously, I need…I want to get Dex’s attention. He is my boyfriend, and I trust him. I know he will be the only one seeing this picture.

With one last deep breath, I whip my shirt off and crawl on the bed. I unhook my bra and toss it on the floor. I angle the phone to capture exactly what Ruby suggested. I’m careful not to get my full face in the photo. Partly because I want to hide my face from any prying eyes, but mostly because I don’t think I’ve mastered my sexy, come-hither eyes yet.

Before I can talk myself out of it, I type, “I’m thinking of you,” and hit the send button. And wait.

And wait.

I stare at the message on my phone waiting to see the delivery message to change to read. Nearly thirty minutes pass before the change and those three little dots telling me a reply is being typed show up. My blood rushes with both excitement and nervousness that he didn’t like the picture.

Dex:God you’re sexy. I can’t wait to get my hands on you.

And that was it.

Really? Do I need to spell it out for him? I. WANT. TO. SEXT. WITH. YOU. DUMMY.

Me:Oh yeah, why don’t you call me and tell me what you’d do to me right now if you were here.

Nothing.

I’m such a loser for sitting there for another thirty minutes, topless no less, staring at the damn phone waiting for a reply. Letting out a sigh of disappointment, I lay my phone on my nightstand, releasing it for the first time since Friday night, and get my PJ’s on.

It's not until the lights are off, and the quietness of my room starts to feel suffocating, that the feeling of defeat takes hold. I’m not the kind of girl who becomes clingy, but two days away from him, and I can’t handle it. I thought I was stronger than this. How am I going to survive this relationship if he’s going to be nearly MIA every time he travels? I wipe a tear from my cheek and force my eyes closed.

I’ll let the embarrassment of the failed sexting attempt bother me tomorrow. Tonight, I’ll nurse this feeling of uncertainty until I fall asleep.

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